Brazen: Olympian Trials
by Appolyon
Summary: Mildly bored eldritch horror attempts to amuse itself by joining in on the adventures of Percy Jackson. Rated M for violence, gore, language, attempts at humor, and a variety of other things that I haven't thought of at this point. Semi-omniversal story.
1. The Lightning Thief

I do not own any material from either Warhammer, Percy Jackson and the Olympians or any other franchise mentioned, implied and/or in this story. Please support the official release.

The opinions of Anicetus are not necessarily shared by the writer.

Poor flames will be ignored, while sufficiently amusing ones may be stolen and used in this story. So be creative. :}

 **Chapter 1**

Welcome, viewers, to another episode of AA Adventures!

Now as you know, we'd normally be posting this in video format, (which will be available at a future date upon purchase) but we're trying to branch out into other formats.

Anyways, on with the show! We rejoin our not-protagonist in its current location.

It had been sitting on the bus, waiting for its newest (potential) source of entertainment to arrive for several hours now, with one of its younger children curled up on its shoulder. The two of them shared a set of headphones as they listened to " **Raise Your Fist, Evangelist"** by Powerwolf.

It checked over its limits once more as it waited, ensuring its power was accurately set and the world altered to account for the presence of this human-born version of itself for this little adventure.

As the bus shuddered to its latest stop, it allowed itself a little smile as it seemed things were finally about to start. It didn't turn as they boarded, instead observing the trio from behind its shades as they passed before it to claim the back seat.

Two males and a single female with backpacks. From their scent and auras, the female and the black haired boy were demigods (inexperienced ones at that), while the one with the rasta cap was a satyr.

It grimaced at that. It despised Grecian satyrs, albeit not as much as fauns.

Anyways, the trio were only slightly nervous, so it seemed they hadn't noticed the three in pursuit.

Aside from the girl slapping her magic Yankees cap against her thigh nervously, they were quiet for several moments, before the girl sat up straight and grabbed her fellow demigod's knee, whispering his name. It seemed like they finally noticed them.

It studied the children's soon-to-be opponents from the corner of its eye over its daughters crimson fur. They appeared as three elderly women, dressed in velvet dresses and lace gloves, with paisley pursed and knitted hats that shadowed their eyes. The first one seemed to have taken an orange color theme, while the two behind it wore green and purple, respectively.

They sat in the front row, right behind the driver. The two on the aisle crossed their legs over the walkway, making an X. The message was clear, but pointless.

The bus pulled away from the station onto the rain-slicked streets of Manhattan. The boy said that the female had claimed one of their pursuers should have been dispelled for a lifetime. She responded with "I said if you're _lucky"_. The satyr just cursed their bad fortune.

The female seemed to be attempting to stay calm as she claimed they were up against "the three worst monsters from the Underworld", and it had to suppress the urge to shout "bullshit."

These three are supposed to he the worst the Underworld has to offer? That's just sad, it feels sad now. Are you proud of yourselves, you made it feel sad.

It wondered if it should gift Hades some proper hunters after this is over.

Anyways, the children were trying to find a way to escape when the jokes finally decided to do their jobs as the bus entered the tunnel, standing up and flatly announcing they had to use the bathroom before stalking towards the children. Not one single fuck was given at their proclamation.

The girl tried to force her cap on the boy, and to its approval, he at first tried to deny her, not wanting to abandon his comrades.

She reasoned that they were probably only after him, and with his scent covering the bus, the jokes might not even notice them.

Seemed unlikely since they were walking directly towards them. He reluctantly donned the cap, disappearing from visible sight.

It tracked him as he moved down the aisle, such a simple trick meaning nothing to its senses.

It idly noted that the song had ended, its daughter shifting slightly as **"Ultrasonic Metal** **"** by Sneak Attack started playing.

One of the jokes, the orange one, stopped for a moment, seeming to have caught the boy's scent and turning to look directly at him, setting his heart into a faster pace.

Its opinion of them rose slightly, before dropping right back down as she seemed to dismiss what her senses were telling the joke before continuing on her way.

Piss-poor senses.

The boy continued up the aisle, nearly making it to the front before the jokes started yelling. They had changed into their true forms, bat-winged hags, each wielding whips that had small tongues of fire dancing along the barbed leather as they surrounded the girl and the satyr.

The other passengers screamed and tried to move away from the jokes, as said jokes tried to interrogate the duo, asking where _it_ was. So, they weren't after these three then, huh?

The girl doesn't seem to have picked up on that, instead shouting that he wasn't here. They responded by raising their whips to strike, and the girl drew a bronze knife while the satyr pulled out a tin can. And what was the boy doing during all this?

Apparently he decided to create some chaos to aid his comrades, lunging for the driver's wheel and jerking it to the side. The passengers yelled as they were thrown from their seats, but it and its daughter were unbothered, with it leaning slightly to compensate for the force.

One of the passengers shot towards it, so it raised its hand to catch them before they impacted, easily halting her with its physical strength. Panicked from the events, the female was flailing and shouting.

It lashed out with its other arm, piercing her ribs and rending her heart, ending her struggle before depositing the new corpse on the seat beside it.

The boy had continued fighting for the wheel, and after the bus had left the tunnel, he decided to give up the battle in favor of pulling the emergency brake, sending the bus into a spin before allowing the still living passengers and the driver to flee from the vehicle, and with them gone the boy removed the cap, shouting to gain the jokes attention in an attempt to draw them off from his comrades.

The joke in orange stalked down the aisle at him, flicking her whip as she went, while green joke and purple joke crawled over the seats, with purple passing over it.

Suppressing its presence, no one noticed it or its child, even when it started tearing strips of soft flesh off the corpse, eating them like string cheese, its daughter dropping down to its lap to tear off her own servings.

They turned to observe as the orange joke tried to intimidate the boy. It wasn't very effective. He drew a pen that, with a click, transformed into a bronze xiphos, causing the orange joke to pause and attempt to convince him to surrender. Still not effective.

Orange lashed out with her whip while the other two jokes lunged at the boy. Orange managed to wrap her whip around the boys arm, but he seemed to be tenacious enough to resist the pain, even managing to strike green with his sword hilt, knocking her back into a seat, before slicing into purples neck, reducing her to gold dust and then slashing back at green, who had managed to recover and attempt another lunge. Predictably, she shared her sister's fate.

Complete lack of coordination.

During this, the girl and the satyr had managed to subdue orange, the girl wrestling her into submission while the satyr managed to disarm her before the two managed to hogtie her with said whip.

Not even strong enough to hold their own against kids and a satyr.

It snorted. Truly, these three were a terrifying force. Cower before the best the Grecian Underworld has to offer.

Its head shot up, ignoring the remaining banter as its sixth sense detected the lightning gathering overhead. For the first time it stood, picking its daughter up and depositing her in its hood, moving towards the back as the children fled the bus and orange made her threats.

It raised a leg, lashing out with a kick that smashed the emergency door off its hinges and sent it flying down the road. It jumped down to the ground as the lightning struck, piercing the bus and breaking the windows.

It turned to observe the children as they fled into the woods, finally stopping the music player and stowing away the headphones, noticing one of the passengers snapping a picture of the boy's face. It turned to reenter the bus, jumping back up from the road, and stalking towards the orange joke, still struggling to escape her bonds and shrieking.

It raised a leg, stomping down onto her back, pinning her to the ground and silencing her. The joke tried to turn her head, no doubt to make some sort of threat or demand its name as her wings tried to knock it off. She didn't have the chance, before it grabbed both of her wings and pulled, ripping them off at the base.

Dropping the severed wings, it removed its leg, reaching down to pick up the writhing-in-agony joke by the neck and squeezing, her bones cracking in its grasp as flesh oozed out between its fingers, her shuddering body falling to the ground.

Bringing her head to its face, it opened its mouth to expose a maw full of silver leonine fangs. Its teeth crunched into her skull, which stayed solid meat and bone while red flames spilled from its fingers to claim the rest. It brought the head over to its daughter to offer her a meal, which she eagerly dug into.

With their appetizer done, it stepped back out through the passenger door to look upon the milling fearful passengers. These would likely be an annoyance to the children on their quest, the mist most likely playing on demigod luck to make them seem at fault, so it may as well do them a favor before it moves to follow.

It lunged towards them, too fast for their paltry senses to register, as it started with the one that had caught the boy's picture.

Reaching out with one hand to crush the camera to powder while the other drove into his stomach, through his chest and out through his head, the torn remains of his upper body blasting into the air.

With that done, it lashed out at the still ignorant humans around it, bone splintering and meat shredding before every blow. Finally it stopped before the last one. A fraction of a second later, the massacre that occurred finally registered on his mind.

He stared at the splattered remains that now surrounded him before looking at it. He fell back as some of the pulped meat and shattered bits of ribcage from its first victim chose this time to land, smacking into his face and torso.

Panicked and still too shocked to scream, he tried to crawl away from it as scarlet flames moved to devour the surrounding corpses. It allowed him to get several feet, before deciding his fear had reached a sufficient level for consumption.

It crossed the distance with ease, its hand piercing his chest, and ripping his heart free. It raised the steaming mass of muscle up to have a taste, smiling at the fear and dopamine salted meat, before tearing half off and offering it up for its daughter to feed.

She yipped her thanks, happily nuzzling her father's cheek (such a good girl), before digging in, balancing on its shoulder while holding her snack with her front paws, and looking positively adorable as she ate.

With the witnesses dead and erased, it turned back to the direction the children had run, setting off after them at an easy lope, leaning down to scoop up their meal as it passed.

* * *

And with that we have our first chapter. Aiming for an Alucard type overpowered (while playing demigod). This character has been around for quite some time, and over the last 15 years has been doing other things and changing parts of the setting, which, if I can keep this story going long enough, will be shown in later chapters.

It has existed for a hell of a lot longer than that and over this time, as well as the periods it spent outside of time, it has developed a vast array of powers, either claiming them from defeated opponents or developing and honing them from its own innate abilities and domains. It will demonstrate a number of these abilities over the story, just not to asspull itself out of situations.

Below we have the abilities that our character has allowed itself access to for the purpose of combat, survival and travel during these little adventures. This is here so it doesn't seem like it is pulling these powers out of its ass as it needs them.

Gifted from birth:

Mark of the True Beast: The bearer was born with a unique and potent rune upon on their flesh, a sigil of pure savagery that reveals the individual as nothing more than a ravenous mass of muscle and fangs. The unbridled, ravening ferocity of this raging predator drives it ever on to acts of endless slaughter. The individual has no need of rest or sleep, allowing it to hunt and fight without pause. Absolute stamina. Absolute endurance. Auto-reflexes. Self-manipulative puppetry. Perpetual consciousness.

Strength From Slaughter: The individual can heal itself by fighting and slaying others, devouring their essence. Can selectively absorb physical traits from defeated and devoured opponents (Example:Nemean Skeleton: Challenged and devoured a pair of Nemean Lions, wanting fangs to rival theirs. Incredibly durable skeletal system.)

From Beyond: The mind of this creature is beyond the petty frailties and precarious sanity of a mortal mind. Immune to fear, madness, and powers that cloud, control or delude its mind.

Daemonic senses: The individual was born where there is no light, space or time, instead possessing other senses, beyond mortal comprehension. The individual can see clearly in areas of absolute darkness, and can detect and track magical forces, souls and essences with all five of their senses.

Hellspawn: Born of unreality, the individual is half composed of empyric power. Immune to disease and (most) poisons. Supernatural survivability.

Anathema: The individual is immune to what they deem cowardly powers, powers that would interfere with proper battle, and may even purge this weakness from others. Immune to direct magic powers. Can destroy magical abilities in weapons, objects and other beings. Incapable of using magic. Incapable of being directly hidden by the Mist. Limited by their personal definition of magic.

Earned/Developed:

Indomitable will

Partially Realized Demigod: The individual realized early in life the true, vast potential of the power at their command and seeks to master it, beginning the process of shedding their human half. Pyrokinesis(capable of generating and controlling both normal fire and a ravenous/destructive fire). Calokinesis(heat). Blood control. Emotional manipulation/amplification. Can generate empyric energies for a variety of effects (sustaining daemons, tearing open portals to unreality, mutations, etc.) Has no need to breathe. Can survive unaided in a vacuum. Can partially transform themselves into blood and/or fire. Conflict domain manipulation. Divine power absorption. Deity consumption.

Superstrength: The individual realized the true limits of their human half, and has strengthened themselves until they are capable of accessing the full extent of that unrealized power without destroying themselves.(I refer you to the amazing manga/anime series Kegan Ashura and Baki to see what I'm talking about.) Muscle armor.

Nemean Cestus: a pair of half-fingered gauntlets made from the same material as a Nemean Lions hide, and studded with the even tougher material that makes up its bones, fangs and claws. Has the ability to grow silvery claws with the same durability and tearing/cutting power as the Lions own claws.

Ideas, feedback and amusing flames are appreciated.


	2. Chapter 2

I do not own any material from either Warhammer, Percy Jackson and the Olympians or any other franchise mentioned, implied and/or used in this story. Please support the official release.

The opinions of Anicetus are not necessarily shared by the writer.

Poor flames will be ignored, while sufficiently amusing ones may be stolen and used in this story. So be creative. :}

 **Chapter 2**

So off they went, faithful viewers, following the children's path along the Hudson, the lights of New York gleaming behind them while it finished off the last of its meal, the bones pleasantly crunching between its teeth as the marrow left a lovely aftertaste.

The satyr was shaking and braying, practically ringing a dinner bell for any other hungry carnivore in the area, as he still seemed to be afraid of the jokes.

Only the girl seemed to be in a decent mental state, pulling the other two along while the boy, apparently still in shock, stumbled along, muttering about their lost supplies.

In response, the girl bit out that he shouldn't have rejoined the fight, and he countered that he couldn't leave them.

The girl claimed she would have been fine.

The satyr disagreed, before mourning his cans.

By now the rain had stopped, and several minutes passed in silence, aside from the squelching mud as these rookies seemed to make no attempt to move quietly or cover their tracks, even though the girl had claimed orange was calling for reinforcements, and as far as they knew, she was still alive.

The girl dropped back to thank the boy for staying to help, which he waved off. She tried to cover herself by claiming it would suck, not only because he would be dead, but this was her first chance to see the world in years.

Its daughter nudged its head, wanting her father's attention. She didn't make a sound, but it still understood her. _"One more time Papa, why are you helping these idiots?"_ It shrugged _._ "An experiment. Boredom, and an experiment."

 _"I get that, but this seems too . . . low for you. Why are you playing here?"_ It simply smiled. "Because this seems like a . . . decent place to play a different game. It can be enlightening to play with stricter rules than others would grant, its a good way to self-improve. Definitely better than just steamrolling everything."

It raised a hand to rub its child's head, getting a happy whine from her. "And I got you here, so it's not all bad, and much like you did, it has unrealized potential."

It sighed. "So damn much unrealized, _wasted_ potential."

It lightly tapped her head. "And I imagine your Grandmother wouldn't appreciate how you mock Her world." She winced at that. _"Sorry Papa."_

It brought its attention back to the children. While they had spoken, the children had continued their own discussion, the girl seeming to have finally realized the jokes wording back on the bus, before the satyr interrupted with his reeds, excited that they hadn't been damaged in the scuffle.

After the boy walked straight into a tree, the three of them seemed to have finally noticed the lights ahead and picked up on the scent of food. It doubted they noticed the charm mixed in though. Oh well, it would be a chance to see what they could do in a more straightforward battle.

The trio exited the tree line, moving onto a deserted two-lane road. On the other side, there was a closed-down gas station, a tattered billboard for the 1995 movie **Se7en** (great film), and a long, single-story warehouse surrounded by stone statues, with a neon sign that read AUNTY EMS GARDEN EMPORIUM. The children, showcasing their dyslexia, needed the satyr to read it out for them.

The demigods crossed the street, following the scent, while the satyr trailed after them, rightfully wary. It remained at the tree line to observe.

The magic seemed to be working on the two just fine, dulling their suspicion, while the satyr was unaffected by the smell of cooked meat, saying that he could smell monsters. The girl dismissed his concerns.

And she's supposed to be the smart one.

It was at this point the door opened, with a woman dressed in a veiled burqa standing in the doorway. The only skin of hers that could be seen was her hands. Coffee-brown, gnarled and wart-covered with bronze claws, at least from its view. Her voice had a vaguely Middle Eastern accent as she asked where their parents were.

Wondering if she had taken lessons to pull off the accent, it decided this seemed like a good point to step in, so it strode out, loudly shouting.

 **Third Person POV**

Percy opened his mouth, ready to lie about being circus orphans, when from behind them a voice shouted "There you idiots are!"(1)

He jumped at the voice, whipping around to see the speaker. Striding from the woods was an oddly dressed teen, who looked like he was several years older than them.

Wearing a pair of shades that hid his eyes, a dark brown leather hoodie (lined with red fur) and pants, a red shirt that had what appeared to be a framed picture of a pair of hands holding an orb with a dragon inside that in-turn was holding a red crystal heart, with the words **DIO SACRED HEART** printed on it, black shoes that seemed to have been designed so the big toe could move freely(2), and golden-brown, half-finger gloves with chunks of silver in the shape of a heart on the back of each hand and silver studs at the knuckles(3).

He had shaggy golden-blonde hair and would have been handsome if it wasn't for the scars, scars that not only covered his face but also his neck, stretching up from below his shirt.

Some were clean-cut grooves that crossed his mug, while others were vicious, ragged things as if a whole lot of animals had tried to maul him, and there was even a crescent row of puncture marks that ran over his forehead, matched by a reversed row that extended out from both sides of his mouth, as if something had tried to bite off the top of his head.

And this strange-looking man was currently striding towards them, his face an expression of annoyance.

"Did you just not understand, or are you purposefully trying to be dumbasses?! I could not have made it any clearer when I said 'don't wander off like fucking morons!' How do you not understand that?! Dogs understand that!" He snarled at the trio, who simply stood there with expressions of shock and confusion at this strange man who acted like he knew them.

At this point the elderly woman stepped in with a firm, "Excuse me, child, do you know these three?" He turned to her, the annoyance melting off his face, replaced with a look of tired apology. "I'm sorry, ma'am, just some kids who wanted to meet you, and who apparently can't FOLLOW SIMPLE DIRECTIONS!" He replied, shooting an irritated glare at said kids before sighing and running a gloved hand through his hair. "I swear, its like herding cats."

The woman blinked at that. "You meant to come here? You've heard of m-my little store?" He walked pass the kids and said, "Of course, of course! I mean, who hasn't heard of the infamous Aunty Em? That is what you're calling yourself now, correct?" giving her a look and a mocking little smile that left her no doubt that he knew exactly what she was.

"I thought it might be good to for the kids to see what real work looks like. Annabeth here in particular" jerking a thumb over his shoulder to indicate the girl, who seemed to have caught on and had given a hard elbow to the boy to keep quiet "wants to be an architect, like her mother, and I thought it would be good to introduce the two of you."

"Perhaps you could provide her mother with a replica of her daughter" he gave her a wicked smile "to showcase your work." He could see the tension leave her body as her thought process followed his implication.

"And you are…?" She asked. At this, he shot up with a winning smile, saying "My mother was kind enough to bless me as Anicetus. And this is my baby girl, Aella!"

With those words, a little blue-eyed, crimson-furred fox kit stood up from where she had been laying in his hood, placing her little paws on his head to support herself and letting out a little squeaking bark sound in tune with Anicetus as he said "Happy, fun, nice to meet you!"

Everyone just blinked at the duo, clearly not knowing what to make of them, so he got things rolling again with "These three haven't been annoying you have they ma'am?" he asked Em. "Oh no, dear, they've been perfect little angels. In fact, I was just about to invite them in for a meal. Would you like to join?"

He clasped his hands together "Why yes, I would like that very much." with Aella yipping her agreement, her little tail thumping against Anicetus' hood.

He turned his head to look over his shoulder at the trio. "Say thank you to Aunty Em, kids." The three looked at each other before turning back with a chorus of, "Thank you ma'am."

Anicetus gave them a dull look. "Well don't you sound chipper." He walked back over to the children.

"Someone's offering to give you what smells like a great meal. You say 'thank you' with a smile on your face and cheer in your heart. Now let's try again. 1, 2, 3," and the trio tried again, louder this time and with awkward smiles.

Anicetus slumped his shoulders and pressed his fist against his forehead with a muttered "Hopeless" before turning back around and walking into Aunty Em's shop, with the children reluctantly following.

From this close, they had seen that even his fingers were covered in scars, as if they had been torn up by knives. Some were even missing nails.

The woman led the way through the warehouse, filled with statues of people, people in different poses, outfits and with a variety of expressions. Grover, Percy and Annabeth at first tried to quietly discuss what to do and who this new guy was.

 **3rd Person Anicetus POV**

It followed the gorgon through her warehouse, noting with disdain that the charm seemed to have reasserted itself over Percy, though Annabeth seemed to be less affected now that it had arrived, no doubt trying to figure out who and what it was, and now likely suspicious of their host. She was casting her gaze around the warehouse, observing the statues and trying to note the exits.

They soon reached the back of the warehouse and the dining area, causing it to blink in surprise.

It hadn't expected that she would actually feed them, it had assumed that the charm was simply a spell to lure them in, and at some point she would simply whirl around and try to petrify them (at which point it had intended to split her in half).

But then again, it supposed that method would make it difficult to achieve the poses it had seen in the warehouse.

The children sat at one of the steel picnic tables and it chose a different one while their hostess disappeared behind the counter to cook, and not long after, she returned with trays heaped with double cheeseburgers, vanilla milkshakes and immense servings of fries.

Well damn, it seems it couldn't preemptively kill her now.

One does not attack someone who feeds you immediately after they fed you unless they try to attack you first. That's just basic manners.

Aella moved to its shoulder before leaping down to the table to share her father's meal. "Are you sure she should be eating that, dear?" The gorgon asked as Aella had already finished half of one of the burgers.

It smiled and patted its child affectionately, saying, "She'll be fine. She's got a strong stomach like her papa." Medusa simply looked at them for another moment before turning back to observe the children.

Annabeth and Percy eagerly dug into their meals as if they hadn't eaten in days, Grover just picking at his fries while eyeing the trays waxed line paper before asking, "What's that hissing noise?"

Percy seemed to at least try to hear what he was talking about while Annabeth simply ignored him. Had she starved herself before this quest?

The gorgon replied, "Perhaps you hear the deep-fryer oil. You have keen ears, Grover." and he smoothly replied with "I take vitamins. For my ears." Annabeth seemed to perk up at that, still having enough of her senses to remember no one had mentioned the satyrs name before now.

Of course, given how recently they had left, that raised the question of how she knew their names. My, my, seems like someone sold them out.

Percy tried to make small talk, uncomfortable with the gorgon staring at them as they ate. She played along, using a low level charm speak to earn sympathy from the children, mentioning her sisters, hinting at this universes event with Athena and Poseidon, and giving Annabeth a few more pieces to work out who she was.

The magic irritated it, but it had more than enough self-control to keep itself from tearing off part of the table, ripping it to pinky-nail sized shreds and making her gargle them until she drowned in her own blood.

Remember, manners.

At this point the gorgon made her move, asking them to pose for a picture. Annabeth, stomach full and sense restored, said, "We really should go." and Grover eagerly agreed, while Percy seemed to have fallen near completely under Medusa's charm speak.

It stayed seated with, "You sure kid?" looking at Annabeth. "Yes, we should. Right now." while Percy tried to convince them to stay.

It decided that was enough. "Yo, Seabiscuit." The demigod turned to look at him with a dazed expression. It pointed at their host. "She's Medusa, and she wants to turn you and your friends to stone, killing you in the process." before turning back to continue its meal.

Everyone froze, staring at the way it had just casually announced that, as if commenting on the weather. It pointedly ignored their stares.

Annabeth and Grover moved first, tossing the food off their table and at the gorgon, who shrieked and tried to wipe the food off before tearing at her veil, but by then the trio had scattered throughout the warehouse. It remained seated, continuing to eat with its daughter, so she advanced on them first.

As she moved towards them, she yelled "You bastard, I'll-" when it looked up and directly at her, causing her to freeze when she saw absolutely nothing happen to it.

Then it stood and walked over, stopping directly in front of her, leaning in till they were nearly nose-to-nose before asking, with that same mocking smirk on its face, "You'll do what?"

Shaking off her surprise, she tried to lash out with one of her claws, seeking to tear its throat. It knocked the offending limb aside with one arm and smiled at her, exposing its own fangs. Etiquette satisfied, it kicked her with enough force to send the gorgon flying back into the warehouse and into a statue of a bear, knocking said statue onto its back, hearing her ribs crack.

It stayed where it was, deciding to leave her to the children. If they couldn't finish her off, especially wounded like this, then this whole affair was clearly a waste of its time.

It turned back to find its daughter lying on her side, stomach bloated, taking a nap after finishing their meal. It snorted in amusement before moving to the counter to make some more while it waited for the victor, stretching out its senses to observe them.

To its suprise, the satyr actually proved useful during the conflict, utilizing his flying shoes to divebomb and distract Medusa. Given his species usual behavior, with their constant whining about that **sniveling little bastard** and the state of the world, it would have thought he would just spend the battle shivering in the corner. This bravery would make him easier to tolerate.

As for the other two, they were mostly just attempting to outmanuever Medusa. While it was understandable, if still annoying, given how recently he was supposed to have been introduced to this world of gods and monsters, why Percy wouldn't utilize his powers to, say, create a film of writhing water between them or wrapping said film around his head so he could look directly at Medusa to battle her, or just fucking strangling her, Annabeth simply relied on her magic cap, displaying no imagination and showing she hadn't developed any of her potential abilities.

Several minutes later, the children returned with Medusa's head wrapped in plastic bags, plopping down at their table again, exhausted from their battle. Percy started with "So we have Athena to thank for this monster?"

Annabeth flashed him an irritated look, no doubt intending to claim it was Poseidon's fault when it decided to step back in with, "Yep, she seemed to think that cursing someone to be an super-powered monster was a good idea."

The children leapt back up, the demigods drawing their weapons while the satyr grabbed a tray, the boys looking panicked at the thought of another enemy while the girl just glared at it for that response.

It just rolled its eyes, ignoring their attempt to be intimidating and walking back to its table with a new tray of fries. "Sit down kids, before you poke your eyes out." They seemed thrown by how little it cared about two Grecian demigods with blades and a satyr with a tray.

Still angry, Annabeth opened her mouth, no doubt to try and convince it about how her mother was in the right. It cut her off with "I'm not in the mood to argue, so if you can justify this line of reasoning, I'll say you're right: Poseidon's fucking someone in my temple?"

"I know, I'll turn her into an _self-r_ _esurrecting_ _, super-powered monster_ and let her run around killing my kids. That'll show him!" And it turned to look at her, watching her annoyed face as she couldn't justify that, instead exclaiming "And what would you have done?!"

Without the slightest pause, "Most likely, one of two things."

"If I was in a good mood, I would have just flashed down there and run them both through with a spear, pinning them there. Then I would have put up a sign that says "In this temple, we pierce you!" or "Poke at your own risk."

"If I was in a bad mood, I still would have killed her, but partway through so Poseidon couldn't finish, and building on that, I would spend the next several years to decades giving him the most horrific case of blue balls in all history, after which no one, or at least not the male Olympians, would want to fuck with me." It said, getting the three to stare wide-eyed at it.

Grover and Percy seemed to have to restrain themselves from taking a step back from it, before Percy regained some nerve.

"Why didn't you help us?" Percy asked, no doubt angry that it didn't finish Medusa off after seeing how easily it had dealt with her. "To see if you, and by extension your quest, were worth my time and assistance. Congratulations, you passed." It said, taking a chug of its milkshake.

With an irritating tone, the boy said, "You-", and predicting the imminent complaining, it cut him off by smashing its hand down on the table, its arm bending down the outer edge and it's hand tearing off the chunk beneath its palm, burying said chunk nearly a foot into the ground.

Cowed by the show of physical power, the boy jumped back to his friends, as it calmly said, "I'm sure you have some little rant about my decision, just as I'm sure you're going to try to make more later on, but I'm gonna tell you something that will make our future interactions just a little bit easier."

"I. Don't. Give. A. Fuck."

"I do whatever the fuck I do. If you don't like it," pause rant here to eat fries, swallow before leaning forward with a cocky, tooth-baring smirk, "then you're welcome to take that shiny little sword of yours and try to change my mind."

"So kids, let's get this over with. I don't feel like sitting around for half an hour to explain everything I say or can do, I am not your fucking exposition dump, so you get three answers. Think carefully on your questions." It said, leaning back in its seat to observe the trio while reaching over to grab some more fries.

Either regaining his courage or forgetting the previous show, Percy stepped forward to start with "Who are you?" It stared, dumbfounded at him. "Perhaps I should have specified 'ask questions you don't know the answers too' but I didn't think I would have too." The boy blushed and glared at the implication.

"But then again, I suppose it makes sense that you would think I was lying to our former hostess."

"Anyways, I have many names, but as I said, my mother blessed me with the title Anicetus."

Annabeth muttered "Ambitious."

It smiled and replied "Accurate."

At Percy's confused look, she explained "Anicetus, its old Latin. It means unconquerable." Then she asked, "Why are you here?" It replied, "Boredom, mostly."

It could see she wanted it to explain further, but chose to use her last question on something else. "What are you?" Ah, a good question at last. She likely thought that if she could pin down its species, she could recognize it and find a weakness. Too bad for her.

It smiled and leaned forward, reaching up to remove its shades, causing the three of them to flinch as they saw its eyes. Discs of bright silver set within almond-shaped pools of burning amber, completely lacking pupil and sclera. Its smile widened, exposing its gleaming fangs as it replied, "There are many words that could be used to describe me, but no single word that fully encompasses what I am, so I personally prefer abomination."

Replacing its shades, "Though as far as you three are concerned, just think of me as an older demigod that's decided to lend a hand to you rookies. So now that show and tell is over, what are you going to do about that?" it said, pointing at the gorgon's head.

With the memories of what it did to Medusa and the table still fresh in their minds, they decided now was not the time to push for info and to focus on the head.

Annoyed at everything that had been happening to him, Percy decided to mail it to Olympus, with Grover warning him that they would think he was impertinent. Percy claimed that he was impertinent. Annabeth just shook her head, saying they needed a new plan.

* * *

1=I like to imagine him with the voice of Dio from the english Jojo's Bizarre Adventures OVA.

2=Shoes worn by Chiharu Shiba from Baki.

3=Longer, recolored, half-finger version of the gloves worn by the stand Cream.

For a basic idea of what Anicetus looks like, he looks similar to Jason Grace, barring the obvious differences

I dropped a few hints in his appearance as to who Anicetus' mother is. She is a canonical character, although this universe' version of her is the most fearsome of all her counterparts. I'm curious if anyone can guess who she is.

Ideas, feedback and amusing flames are appreciated.


	3. Chapter 3

I do not own any material from either Warhammer, Percy Jackson and the Olympians or any other franchise mentioned, implied and/or used in this story. Please support the official release.

The opinions of Anicetus are not necessarily shared by the writer.

Poor flames will be ignored, while sufficiently amusing ones may be stolen and used in this story. So be creative. :}

 **Chapter 3**

Apparently unwilling to sleep in the warehouse, the children chose to move on.

Not caring, it followed.

They made camp about a hundred yards from the main road, in a marshy clearing where the local kids came to party, the leftover trash and prints in the dirt making that obvious.

They decided to sleep in shifts, with Percy going first. It seemed they had unanimously chosen to ignore it for now.

Unconcerned, it climbed a tree, claiming a decently sturdy bough before resting on its back, hands behind its head and legs crossed, keeping its eyes open behind its shades as it kept its own vigil. Aella moved from its hood to lay down, legs splayed out, on her father's warm chest.

Annabeth curled up on the blankets, at first trying (and failing) to subtly watch it, but her own exhaustion soon had her snoring.

Grover chose a different tree, using his flying shoes to sit on the lowest branch with his back against the trunk, staring up at the night sky instead of resting.

Percy tried to assure him that the satyr didn't have to worry, saying he would wake him if there was trouble. He nodded, but remained awake. "It makes me sad, Percy."

"What does? The fact that you signed up for this stupid quest?"

"NO. _This_ makes me sad." He pointed at all the garbage on the ground. "And the sky. You can't even see the stars. They've polluted the sky. This is a terrible time to be a satyr."

It gave no sign of its growing irritation at this conversation. And then he mentioned _**his**_ name, correcting Percy after he mispronounced _**Pan**_ as Pam, asking Percy what he thought his license was for.

Percy was silent for a moment, observing the filth that had been piled up in the clearing. "Tell me about the search." Grover looked at him cautiously, as if he were afraid Percy was mocking him.

"The God of Wild Places disappeared two thousand years ago," he told Percy. "A sailor off the coast of Ephesos heard a mysterious voice crying out from the shore, 'Tell them that the great god Pan had died!' When humans heard the news, they believed it. They've been pillaging Pan's kingdom ever since."

Oh, please, they were pillaging long before _**that coward**_ fled.

"But for the satyrs, Pan was our lord and master. He protected us and the wild places of the earth. We refuse to believe that he died. In every generation, the bravest satyrs pledge their lives to finding Pan. They search the earth, exploring all the wildest places, hoping to find where he is hidden, and wake him from his sleep."

Now it had moved from irritation to blistering rage(or at least its own equivalent), and still it gave no sign, restraining the desire to beat the satyr until it shattered his bones, before boiling his brains from his skull, after listening to how he praised _**that miserable coward**_ and complained about the state of the world.

The only reason it didn't rip his head from his shoulders was because it recognized that there was some ram in this satyr, as opposed to the timid sheep most of his kind were.

In fact, the satyr vaguely reminded it of Usopp, and its rage cooled slightly at that bit of nostalgia.

The duos conversation had moved on at this point to how Grover and Annabeth had noticed the jokes wording back on the bus, and tried to explain it to Percy. It apparently didn't register on him as the only problem he saw was that Zeus had decided he had stolen it.

And that was another thing. What kind of batman/ninja training did Zeus think Percy had to be able to sneak into Olympus and steal a weapon that it doubted Zeus ever let be more than arm's length away from him?

It smiled to itself as it mentally pictured Percy sneaking up to Zeus' throne under the cover of a cardboard box. Solid Seabiscuit.

"That's not what I mean," Grover said. "The Fur-The Kindly Ones were sort of holding back. Like Mrs. Dodds at Yancy Academy… why did she wait so long to try to kill you?"

Well, that could be put down to the same reasons the monsters of this world try to drug these demigods instead of killing them on the spot, like any decent murderer.

"Then on the bus, they just weren't as aggressive as they could've been."

Percy still didn't get it, and Grover left the ominous thought that if they were wrong, and Hades didn't have the bolt…

It had its own thoughts on the possibilities.

One was, assuming Hades did have the bolt, then the jokes were sent to draw suspicion off of him and back onto Percy.

Another was that the master bolt wasn't the only item that had been stolen, and they assumed that Percy had somehow stolen this other item with his Metal Gear skills.

Again, seriously, they thought _this_ kid was a master thief? Who is in charge of their intelligence to allow such a massive fuck-up?

Percy admitted that he didn't care about the bolt, and he was going to the Grecian Underworld to get back his mother. It smiled at that as its opinion of Percy rose.

One should always fight for family.

Grover asked if that was the only reason, and Percy rejected the idea that he was doing this to impress Poseidon. Grover responded with his skill of reading emotions in others.

It knew it was a skill and not an ability since he didn't sense the blood-crazed, frenzied hanger that was its equivalent of calm, and immediately die of heart-bursting terror the moment he stepped on the bus, let alone how pissed it felt now.

Grover stated that Percy was glad to find out about Poseidon, happy that he had been claimed, and that he wanted to make him proud, and that was why he mailed Medusa's head to Olympus. Percy still didn't agree. Grover just decided to drop the subject.

It agreed with Grover, sadly.

Anyways, Grover decided to take first watch, and started to play Mozart, causing Percy to drift off.

It remained silent and still throughout the night, all through Grover and Annabeths shift. When she woke up, it wasn't surprised to find one of the first things she did was take a look to see if it was still there. Without moving, "Morning kid. Sleep well?"

She chose not to answer, instead continuing her suspicious stare, before deciding to continue her previous plan of ignoring it while Grover decided to look around. At this point it sensed another essence interact with Percys. So, someone wanted to talk to the kid, huh?

At this point it decided to move, grabbing its daughter by her belly before rolling to the side off the branch, landing silently, while Annabeth moved to wake up Percy.

It was bored, so long story short, Grover found a poodle with a reward, and after returning him, they hitched a ride on a train. Onward!

* * *

SuperSaiyanDiclonius : Both myself and Anicetus are very fond of Orks (Greenskins represent!), but it is rather unlikely that any version of Gork and/or Mork will be taking an interest. But now that you have suggested it, I may include something of the Orks in the future. Thank you for the idea, and if you or anyone else wish to give me any more, I would be happy to listen.

thefoolswriter /York52 : I am glad that you like the story so far. Since neither of you said what you find confusing, I am going to assume that it is how Anicetus isn't going on about his background and what he can do like most of the people at and below my current writing level do. To put it simply, this is mostly written from Anicetus' point of view, and I can't think of any reason why Anicetus would go over info he already knows to himself. This is something like a Mad Max story, in the sense that we are just dropping in to view this particular jaunt.

I intend for this story to be a omni-, multi-, whatever the hell you wanna call it versal one (Anicetus uses the term endless reality) so we will be seeing other OC's, as well as characters, objects and concepts form other franchises(though the way things are going right now, they will most likely only have minor roles, at least at first).

Also, I altered the first two chapters, the latest changes being made as of October 8th, minor changes but still, so you may want to go back and check.

Ideas, feedback and amusing flames are appreciated.


	4. Chapter 4

I do not own any material from either Warhammer, Percy Jackson and the Olympians or any other franchise mentioned, implied and/or used in this story. Please support the official release.

The opinions of Anicetus are not necessarily shared by the writer.

Poor flames will be ignored, while sufficiently amusing ones may be stolen and used in this story. So be creative. :}

 **Chapter 4**

The next two days were spent heading west on a train, and Aella was very excited for the first one.

Given that this was an Amtrak train, the staff tried to refuse them entry because of Aella. In response, it threatened to go Rail Tracer on them, leaving them thinly smeared across the inside of a train car of their choice. They wisely chose to ignore its daughter.

She had never been on a train before, and it showed. She was running beneath the seats, weaving between the various passengers legs, most of whom found her adorable, and leaping over the seats.

At one point she stole one of Grovers fake feet, and spent the next half-hour playing keep-away with the satyr. It stayed far enough that the mist would make the passengers think she just stole his shoe.

It was honestly suprised no one had recognized its human-born form yet. Then again, most of the havoc it had wreaked happened outside of the U.S.A. (outside of a few thousand murder cases, but given how little it left, they likely shoved those into unsolved or animal attacks), so it supposed it made sense that most wouldn't recognize it. Yet.

There was no attack either day, yet the kids spent most of the first one trying to remain alert. It spent it playing with its daughter, and managed to get the passengers to sing **Turn The World Around** by Harry Belafonte(good song). Soon enough, the trio started to relax (just a little) around it.

At one point Aella spotted a family of centaurs, and was up on her hind legs, tail wagging, paws on the window barking at them. Later they spotted an American Nemean (Nemerican? Amenean?) Lion, causing it to give a similar response as its daughter.

The children couldn't afford berths, so they slept in their seats. Percy and Annabeth sat next to each other, Grover sat ahead of them and it sat with Aella behind Percy and Annabeth. After Percy and Annabeth managed to get Grovers fake foot back on for the 5th time, she turned to him to ask who he was talking to in his sleep.

"What do you mean?"

"When you were asleep just now, you mumbled, 'I won't help you.' Who were you dreaming about?"

He hesitated at first, before telling her about an evil voice in a pit offering his mother in return for his aid against Olympus.

Annabeth was quiet for several moments. "That doesn't sound like Hades. He always appears on a black throne, and he never laughs."

"He offered my mother in trade. Who else could do that?"

It entered the conversation with, "Theoretically several. Thanatos springs to mind. Also Melinoe. If your mother is dead, she might have hold of her soul and may know how to resurrect someone, though you said it was a males voice, so if it is her, she could be using someone else as a messanger."

Annabeth nodded at those possibilities. "But there is still the question of why they would ask you to bring them the master bolt if they already have it?"

Percy just shook his head. Grover snorted in his sleep, muttered about vegetables and turned his head. Annabeth readjusted his cap to cover his nubs.

"Percy, you can't barter with Hades. You know that, right? He's deceitful, heartless, and greedy. I don't care if his Kindly Ones weren't as aggressive this time-"

"This time?" Percy asked "You mean you've run into them before?"

"Let's just say I've got no love for the Lord of the Dead. You can't be tempted to make a deal for your mom."

"What would you do if it was your dad?"

"That's easy," she said. "I'd leave him to rot."

"You're not serious?"

She turned to him with a look of cold anger. "My dad's resented me since the day I was born, Percy," she said. "He never wanted a baby. When he got me, he asked Athena to take me back and raise me on Olympus because he was too busy with his work. She wasn't happy about that. She told him heroes had to be raised by their mortal parent."

What an egocentric brat.

She knew he didn't want a child, and she forced one on him anyway.

The fact that she seems to think that it is a good idea seems similar to an ignorant brat in some teenage drama thinking getting knocked up would do wonders for a difficult relationship.

But it kept its mouth shut. It cared enough about its mother to tear apart those that insulted her, and so it maintained a certain decency by not insulting others who cared in such a manner, even if the women in question did not deserve such loyalty.

Percy tried to change the mood by asking about her childhood. She said. "When I was five, my dad got married and totally forgot about Athena. He got a 'regular' mortal wife, and had two 'regular' mortal kids, and tried to pretend I didn't exist."

Realizing this wasn't working, Percy tried a different tactic. "My mom married a really awful guy," he told her. "Grover said she did it to protect me, to hide me in the scent of a human family. Maybe that's what your dad was thinking.

"He doesn't care about me," she said. "His wife - my stepmom - treated me like a freak. She wouldn't let me play with her children. My dad went along with her. Whenever something dangerous happened - you know, something with monsters - they would both look at me resentfully, like, 'How dare you put our family at risk.' Finally, I took the hint. I wasn't wanted. I ran away."

It turned this info over in its mind, and found holes in it. First, why was she saying "mortal" as if she wasn't?

Second, how was the scent of four humans incapable of covering the scent of a single demigod that, even now, lacked any real power, while two could cover the scent of a child of Poseidon?

The answer it came to was that Percys father must have been watching over him in his early years, while Athena couldn't be bothered to do her duty as a parent. Perhaps he wasn't _as much_ of a failure as it first thought.

Athena's failure was no suprise, given its experience with her more annoying half.

Percy asked "How old were you?"

"Same age as when I started camp. Seven."

"But . . . you couldn't have gotten all the way to Half-Blood Hill by yourself."

"Not alone, no. Athena watched over me, guided me toward help. I made a couple of unexpected friends who took care of me, for a short time, anyway."

It wondered how much of this was true, and how much was simply the biased view of a scared, angry little girl.

Percy wanted to ask her more questions, but he could tell she was lost in memories, so he just stared out the window, allowing the rest of the day to pass in silence.

Aside from more Harry Belafonte.

And some KISS.

* * *

On their second day on the train, June 13, eight days before the kids deadline, the train rolled into St. Louis.

Annabeth craned her neck to look at the Gateway Arch, sighing, "I want to do that."

"What?" Percy asked.

"Build something like that. Have you ever seen the Parthenon, Percy?"

"Only in pictures."

"Someday, I'm going to see it in person. I'm going to build the greatest monument to the gods, ever. Something that'll last a thousand years."

It suppressed a snort. It doubted that she would ever possess the drive, the strength, necessary to develop enough power to see the Parthenon. At least not on her own.

Percy seemed to think that was funny, laughing, "You? An architect?"

"Yes, an architect. Athena expects her children to create things, not just tear them down, like a certain god of earthquakes I could mention."

Percy just looked out the train window at the Mississippi River.

"Sorry," Annabeth said. "That was mean."

"Can't we work together a little?" Percy pleaded. "Didn't Poseidon and Athena ever cooperate?"

Annabeth paused to think. "I guess . . . the chariot," she said tentatively. "My mom invented it, but Poseidon created horses out of the crests of waves. So they had to work together to make it complete."

Ah, that's right, the Grecian faithborn like to share their delusions with their children.

It never understood why Athena's proud children would want to tell a story that had their mother making something without it being able to work on its own. It was like claiming she had invented the flashlight without thinking of batteries, or even electricity.

Anyways, Percy said, "Then we can cooperate, too. Right?"

"I suppose," she said.

The train pulled into the downtown station. The intercom announced that there would be a three-hour layover before departing for Denver.

Grover stretched. Before he was even fully awake, he said, "Food."

That, is the wisest thing it has ever heard a (Grecian) satyr say. Hail your prophet and savior.

"Come on, goat boy," Annabeth said. "Sightseeing."

"Sightseeing?"

"The Gateway Arch," she said. "This may be my only chance to ride to the top. Are you coming or not?"

It hadn't hunted, fought or killed anything for roughly two days, and if it wasn't for its absolute will and self-discipline, it would have frenzied and killed everyone on the train before slaughtering everything within at least 50 miles.

And that was just how this human-born version would be feeling, to say nothing of its true hunger, so it was going to find and fight/butcher something while the children went sightseeing.

At least, that was its intention, until Aella jumped on its head, bending forward until she was looking at it upside down, deep blue eyes (so like her mothers) going full puppy-dog, she pleaded, _"Oh can we go, Papa? Can we? Can we? Can we? Pleeeeaaassse!"_

It blinked behind its shades before sighing. "Alright, alright, we can go with them."

 _"Yay, thanks Papa!"_ She said, licking its face in gratitude before leaping over to Annabeth's shoulder, easily crossing the distance before projecting her voice into Annabeth's mind. _"Let's go!"_

Predictably, Annabeth started, both at the sudden leap and the voice of an eight-year-old girl in her head. "You can talk!?"

Aella giggled. _"Of course I can talk, silly. How did you think I talk to Papa? Now lets go, lets go!"_

And with that, they went off to the Arch.

* * *

The Arch was about a mile from the train station. At this time of day, the lines were short. They moved through the underground museum, looking at the various exhibits. Annabeth kept spouting facts about how the Arch was built, and Aella seemed to be really getting into the experience, eating up the lecture as she cuddled up on Annabeths shoulder.

It smiled at seeing her having a good time.

"So . . ." Grover tried to make small talk. It turned to him with a brow raised, keeping Aella in the corner of its eye. "That's your kid?" Looking at the crimson fox on Annabeths shoulder and the human-looking teen next to him, "Does she take after her mother?"

It kept the brow raised. "And what makes you say that?"

He awkwardly tried to say, "Well I mean . . . she's a fox . . . and you're . . ."

Half of its mouth pulled up into an amused smirk. "And what makes you think this is what I really look like?"

It turned back to its daughters direction. "Most of her appearance has little to do with me or my wife. I fou-"

"You're married!?" Percy suddenly cut in, apparently shocked.

It silently looked at him, juuuuuust long enough to make it uncomfortable, before saying, "Yes Purse, I'm married. And _as I was saying_ , I found her a little under a year ago, so her appearance has little to do with us."

Now Grover, "So what's she like?"

"My wife?" It asked.

"Yeah."

It smiled, a flushed look of pure affection softening its battle-scarred features. "She's incredible, a truly wonderful woman! She's so sweet!"

They stared at it for a moment, watching it fantasize about its wife, saying, "Desu! Desu, Desu, Desu!" with hints of happy canine whining mixed into its voice.

If it had a tail, it would be wagging.

Meanwhile, Percy decided to give up on talking to it and turned to Grover. "So, do you smell anything?"

He stopped eating his jelly-beans long enough to take a sniff. "Underground," he said distastefully. "Underground air always smells like monsters. Probably doesn't mean anything."

With the confirmation that he hadn't noticed the two behind them, it dragged itself out of a pleasant daydream of its Desu . . . her soft, snow-white skin clad in nothing but gleaming, sticky gore from their latest battle, reaching out to pull it close and telling it to lick her clean . . . to wonder how he hadn't picked up on the scents of snake and lion.

"Guys," Percy said. "You know the gods' symbols of power?"

Annabeth and Aella had been in the middle of reading about the construction equipment used to build the Arch, but Annabeth looked over. "Yeah?"

"Well, Hade-"

Grover cleared his throat. "We're in a public place Percy. You mean, our friend downstairs?"

"Um, right." He said. "Our friend way downstairs. Doesn't he have a hat like Annabeth's?"

"You mean the Helm of Darkness," Annabeth said. "Yeah, that's his symbol of power. I saw it next to his seat during the winter solstice council meeting."

"He was there?" Percy asked.

She nodded. "It's the only time he's allowed to visit Olympus-the darkest day of the year. But his helm is a lot more powerful than my invisibility hat, if what I've heard is true."

"It allows him to become darkness," Grover said. "He can melt into shadow or pass through walls. He can't be touched, or seen, or heard. And he can radiate fear so intense it can drive you insane or stop your heart. Why do you think all rational creatures fear the dark?"

It answered, "Thousands of years of experience and common sense telling them it's not a good idea to go into a place where there senses can't function well, and leftover anxiety encoded into them about how there could be hungry predators lurking in the dark."

It is _really_ fucking tired of Olympian delusions.

". . . Anyways," Percy said, "My point is, how do we know he's not here right now, watching us?"

Annabeth and Grover exchanged looks.

"We don't," Grover said.

With an eye-roll, "Oh please, Hades ain't gonna put everything else on hold just to follow you three. Besides, if he was here, he would have killed you all by now." It stated, diffusing the tension.

Before bringing it right back with, "I imagine he would only send his servants to stalk and murder you."

"Thanks, that makes me feel a lot better." Percy said dryly, before asking Grover for blue jellybeans to ease his nerves, before pausing. "Wouldn't he kill you too?"

It just snorted, "He could try, but he'd find I'm a lot tougher and a hell of a lot more vicious than the demigods he's used to."

Next they moved to an elevator to go to the top, and they were crowded into one with their pursuers. They seemed to possess the ability to shapeshift, one appearing as an obese woman wearing a blue denim dress and a floppy denim hat, and the other appearing as a Chihuahua with a rhinestone collar.

"No parents?" The fat lady asked, looking at them with beady eyes and pointy, coffee-stained teeth.

"They're below," Annabeth told her. "Scared of heights."

"Oh the poor darlings."

Glaring at them with the same beady eyes as the woman, the Chihuahua growled. The woman said, "Now, now, sonny. Behave."

Percy asked her if 'sonny' was the dogs name. She said, "No," and smiled.

It was looking at Grover and wondering how he still couldn't smell these two, since he couldn't be any closer to them without dry-humping one.

It turned back to look at the woman as Aella eyed the Chihuahua. It smiled, thinking that they might be fun.

The top of the arch was a roughly upside-down trapezoid shaped tunnel with relatively thin rectangular windows. Aella hopped off Annabeth's shoulder to look through said windows. Percy was nervous, no doubt from being over 600 feet in the air.

It tapped him on the shoulder, getting him to start. "Nervous about Zeus?" He hesitated before nodding slightly.

"Don't worry about it, kid. This place is built to handle earthquakes and lightning. You're safer from Sparky's bitchfits here than you would be on the ground." He started, and turned to stare wide-eyed at it.

". . . What?"

". . . Nothing." Percy said, taking a sideways step away from it.

Annabeth kept talking about structural supports and everything she would have done to improve the Arch. After half-an-hour of this, the staff announced that the observation deck would be closing in a few minutes.

Percy steered Grover and Annabeth toward the exit and loaded them into the elevator, before realizing there was no room for him. The park ranger told him, "Next car, sir." Annabeth offered for them to get out and wait with him, but Percy told them it was fine and that they would wait.

After they left the only ones remaining were Aella, Anicetus, Percy, a little boy with his parents, the park ranger and the two pretending to be a human and a dog.

It turned to look at her. "Okay, I'm fucking bored, let's get started."

She just smiled condescendingly in response, her forked tongue flickering between her teeth.

The Chihuahua started yapping at them, foam dripping from black lips. "Now, now, sonny," the woman said. "Even if he has a death wish, does this look like a good time? We have all these nice people here."

It added, "You should teach your kid self-restraint. Mother hammered that lesson into me early on, and it's done wonders for me and my children. I mean, just look at my baby girl," it said, gesturing to Aella, who sat quietly by a window, glaring hungrily at the dog while retaining a dignified pose.

She frowned at the criticism. "Go ahead, son."

Nervously, Percy asked, "Um, did you just call that Chihuahua your son?"

"Chimera, dear," she corrected. "Not a Chihuahua. It's an easy mistake to make."

She rolled up her denim sleeves, revealing that the skin of her arms was scaly and green. She smiled, showing that her teeth had changed into fangs while her pupils turned into vertical slits.

The dog barked, growing with each bark, said bark changing into a roar.

The little boy screamed. His parents pulled him back toward the exit, straight into the park ranger, who stood, paralyzed, gaping at the monster.

The Chimera was now tall enough that its back nearly reached the roof. It had the head of a lion with a mane caked in dry blood, the body of a goat and a serpent for a tail, a ten-foot-long diamondback growing right out of its shaggy behind. The rhinestone dog collar still hung around its neck, and the plate-sized dog tag was easier to read: CHIMERA - RABID, FIRE-BREATHING, POISONOUS - IF FOUND, PLEASE CALL TARTARUS - EXT. 954.

"Be honored, demigods. Lord Zeus rarely allows me to test a hero with one of my brood."

It saw Percy was frozen in fear, keeping his eyes locked on the Chimera, so it asked him a very important question. "So which one you want kid, rug-and-wallet or belt-and-boots?"

Echidna, Percy and the Chimera all turned to look at it, blinking in confusion.

It rolled its eyes, "I said do you want to fight rug-and-wallet," raising a hand to point at the Chimera, before moving its arm to indicate Echidna, "Or belt-and-boots over there? Personally, I want to kill her, but its your first quest, so I'm willing to let you pick."

Echidna laughed, asking, "Do you really think you are strong enough to defeat me, hero? Me, the Mother of Monsters, the terrible Echidna?"

It chuckled, head bowed (slight tilt), eyed closed and an easy smile on its face as it reached up to remove its shades, folding them with a flick of its wrist before tucking them into its jacket.

"Well," it started, before suddenly dashing forward, moving up and over the Arches wall, easily bypassing the Chimera, before kicking off into a roundhouse that smashed into Echidnas startled face, sending her partly through the wall, leaving her hanging halfway out on her back.

Next, it reached up to push off the ceiling, buckling it where its hands pressed, slamming its feet into her stomach, sending them both crashing through the metal, and into freefall.

It wasn't concerned about the Chimera. If Percy died fighting it, then it would make practice and a good meal for Aella.

Practically crouching over her flailing form, it grabbed the collar of her dress to pull her closer to it, the air screaming around them as her face, shocked and fearful at the mad manuever, stared into its own, its mouth pulled back into a savage smile that exposed its fangs, its eyes burning orange-yellow suns and hungry silver stars, "LETS FIND OUT!" before drawing one arm back and decking her with a haymaker that sent her spinning away from it, aiming her toward the river.

It looked down at the rapidly closing grass lawn below. It drew back an arm and waited . . . waited . . . now!

Its arm lashed out at the ground, clawing into it and sending it hurtling back. First its shoulder hit the ground, then its hip, dispersing the impact in intervals, rolling before its hands sunk down into the dirt, ending in a sprinters crouch, facing the direction it sent her.

It didn't hesitate, dashing forward towards the stone steps, passing a divot in the grass where she had landed before no doubt bouncing, halting at the top to see her dragging her body towards the river. It could see the impact had hurt her, one of her legs twisted, her dress ripped to expose torn and bruised flesh. It waited, suspecting what she was up to.

She hauled her body into the river, the water turning green and slimy where she entered, the effect spreading dozens of feet. It remembered that Echidna was supposed to be descended from water creatures, so it stood to reason that she could be healed and empowered by it.

She's gonna need her best.

It moved back to stand in the park, far enough that the river was out of its sight, pulling its music player out to pick a soundtrack.

Blues Saraceno? . . . Nah.

DMC? . . . Nah.

Ooh, The Beast! Nice!

It made its choice, **Randall Flagg** starting to play as she broke the surface, hissing like steam.

 _Spirits of steel no longer mourn._

 _Your children have risen to carry your scorn_

 _Restoring the airwaves from what we despise._

 _You were Born . . . to Metalize._

Her clawed hands dragged her body back up the steps, her reptilian eyes burning with rage, seeking it out as she coiled her full length on the lawn.

She was big, her lamia-like form easily 40 feet from head to tail, her whole body covered in green scales. Her lower body was a snake. Not a snake tail, a genuine snake, extending down from her waist to end in a massive viper head that glared and hissed at it, venom dripping from its fangs that burned the grass where it landed.

Her torso, while to-scale with the rest of her body, had lost the fat she had in her human form, becoming relatively slender. She had four limbs now, the extra two being snakes. Her mouth had two slits stretching from the sides, making it seem like she had a long smile, though that mouth now bared fangs.

 _The beast is ready to devour!_

It just laughed before launching itself at her, hunched low to the ground as it ran.

She met its charge with her tail, swinging it at it from the side in an attempt to knock it away.

Driving one heel into the ground, it turned to face the attack, one arm drawn back before slinging it forward to collide with the tail, bashing it aside before continuing the spin and hitting the ground with its other leg to launch into a new dash.

It swiftly closed the distance, tackling her lower body and knocking her onto her back with a shriek, a shriek that grew desperate when it sank its jaws into scaled flesh, tearing off and swallowing chunks of her.

Her snake arms lashed down to knock it off, hammering into it to send it flying back. It let go and went with the hits, flipping with it to land on its feet, one last chunk of flesh still visible in its jaws. It bit down, shearing through the meat and catching the part that fell off, swallowing down its current mouthful.

She drew herself back up, huffing in pain. Given her size, it hadn't been able to get through to anything vital in the brief time it had, leaving only flesh wounds so far.

It met her eyes, expecting rage, and was jarred to see fear there, to see her considering fleeing from it. No. No. Really?

She was supposed to be able to survive Typhons amorous attentions (in the back of its mind it wondered how that worked. Could one of them change size? Or maybe it had stumbled upon the secret origin of tentacle porn.)

(But that last one, if true, raised new questions, like when had Typhon and Echidna gone to Japan and fucked/traumatized that into their minds? . . . Questions for later). She should be tougher than this!

Motherfu- She's even backing up now!

No. _No._

It willed it, and a wall of white hot flame sprang to life behind her, screaming up to tower over her, stopping her short as she twisted around at the barrier.

It sighed, appearing to drop its guard as it rubbed the back of its head and paused the song, looking at her with a brow raised.

"Is that it?"

She paused at that, turning back from the wall of flame to the thing before her.

"Is that really all the 'mother of monsters' has to offer? I mean, I expect this sort of half-assery from Olympus, but really? Are you sure you're Typhons wife?"

That made her mad, hissing at the thing, opening her mouth, no doubt intending to spit some insult before -

"Does he even know you exist?"

That stopped her, a questioning look appearing.

"Let's be honest, for all his power, Typhon isn't all that great at paying attention to what's around him, so I have to wonder . . . _did he even notice you when you were making your children_ _?"_

"YOU MISERABLE LITT-"

"Eh, whatever, if you can't find enough spine to finish the fight-"

It raised a hand at her

"- then I'll give ya some."

It reached out with a bit of itself, and drowned her.

Echidna froze up for a moment, her spine threatening to snap as she twisted back and convulsed before jerking back up, all fear vanishing from her, before every eye on her widened, suddenly burning with an overwhelming need to fight, kill, slaughter, bite, bite, _bite, bite, **BITE**_ , and every visible muscle on her body suddenly tensed and bulged with berserk madness, partially restoring her previous bloated appearance.

That same vicious grin returned to its face, playing **Randall Flagg** once more as the wall of flame vanished.

This time she made the first move, launching herself forward, roaring oaths of painful death, and it moved to meet her. She led with a single large fist, attempting to knock it back. Wishing to test her new strength, it flung itself forward, meeting her fist with its skull.

There was the crack of her fingers breaking, but it was the one that flew back further into the park, into one of the ponds, causing it to skip once over the surface before it smashed its heels through the water and into the ground, pushing back against the ground and ready to continue the brawl.

A trail of steaming blood dripping down its face, the water boiling where it fell, while Echidna was rapidly closing the distance, crashing through trees before entering the pond. She reared up, her mouth opening, the slits stretching to expose the pink skin connecting her jaws as they unhinged and her snake arms did the same, before jets of flame spouted from the maws.

It easily dodged the attack, feeling the heat was only suited for roasting flesh. She kept up the assault as she closed the distance, before lashing out with the same arm that sent it flying, punching straight through the flames. It noticed that her fingers were only torn and bleeding, already in the process of healing.

It stepped aside from the strike, seeing her presence was altering the pond(save where its own blood had fallen), changing it just as she had the river water. It lashed out with a leg, the force breaking her forearm bad enough that it snapped and bent, bone tearing through her scales on the other side.

It kept moving, swirling around her arm to grab the exposed bone before she could pull it back, yanking on the limb and dragging her down with it. She fell forward, before stabilizing herself by coiling her tail under her, and then jerking back, dragging it into the air with her arm.

Still holding on, it spun around before slamming a foot into her joint, causing her arm to jerk inward, bringing it close to her face. It let go and turned as the arm moved, lashing out with a kick that snapped her head to the side and dragged most of her body out of the water, knocking her onto her side.

Her tail head tried to attack it from its left as it landed, but it turned and grabbed the viper by its long fangs, its foot slamming into the lower jaw to keep the maw open as it drew its other leg back before sending it into the roof of the tail-snakes mouth, the sheer force blasting the serpents now ruined brains against the top of its skull. It tossed the head out of the water with the rest of her body to keep it from healing.

She had already pushed herself back up, her face torn to expose scorched bone where it had struck, but under the effects of its own hunger, she didn't care about the pain.

Liquid metal poured from the openings of its gloves at it strode towards her, hardening over its fingers to form curved silvery claws as it rolled up its sleeves to expose more of the golden-brown gloves.

One of her snake arms opened to breathe fire at it, so it raised its arms and used them to cover its favorite shirt, the flame pouring off the Nemo Lion-skin gloves as it charged through the flame, accomplishing nothing save singing the enhanced Leucrota-leather clothing.

As it closed with her body, it ducked low to the ground beneath the flames, before launching up with its claws bared. The claws easily hooked into and tore through the snake head where it was attached to her torso, causing the still spouting flames to start jetting from her body instead.

The other snake head sunk into its side, easily piercing its leather armor, but its arm was already moving to sever the head, even before it felt fire start pouring from the serpents mouth.

It landed and crossed its arm to block the next attack, her tail slamming down on it, knocking it on its back and driving it into the ground.

She raised her tail to slam down again, and as the limb closed in, it lashed out with a sideswipe kick from its current position, knocking the tail off-course so it would land next to it, the heavy blow gouging a trench into the ground.

Its claws tore into the tail, and driven by its immense strength, they nearly tore it in half on the first strike before she pulled back. The leftover strings of flesh were insufficient to support the weight of the serpent head, so it tore off as the tail withdrew, the head thudding to the ground.

She lunged forward, striking with her remaining arms. It met her strikes, its claws tearing her fingers off one hand, then most of her hand off the other, and she still didn't care, drawing them back to smash down on it with the force of wrecking balls. It raised its own arms to deflect hers, knocking them aside as they drew near, turning its own to rip open her forearms before she opened her jaws in an attempt to burn it.

It jumped to meet her, its palm striking her chin, slamming her jaws shut, breaking several of her fangs as her head snapped back, tongues of flame escaping between broken teeth, before landing several blows on her torso as it fell, its claws hooked to dig long furrows of broken ribs and torn flesh.

It raised a leg to kick off her body before it hit the ground, saving it from being sideswiped by a sudden blast of slimy, green water.

Echidna stared madly at it as the brackish water floated in the air around her in long tendrils, her skin bursting as strands of muscle tore loose from her overclocked form, her body and spirit ultimately too frail to withstand its thirst.

It charged again, letting its hands hang limp behind it as it ran. She lashed out with a single slimy tendril, and it hit back with a straight palm strike, just impacting the surface of the slimy jet, the impact causing the water to explode back in the direction of the strike.

She tried again with the rest of the water, and it dispelled each with similar blows, causing the water to blast out away from the two. She burst through the last dispelled attack, her wounds sealed over with her water healing, though it seemed she hadn't regenerated her missing parts and broken fangs yet. Her jaws were unhinged, stretched wide and ready to swallow it.

It met her with its own, its fangs shearing through the middle of her lower jaw, taking part of her tongue and several of her teeth with it, leaving the mandible split in two.

It wrapped its arms around her neck and swung around to lay on her back, her ruined hands reaching back in an attempt to batter it off.

It dragged its claws around to tear her throat open and it planted its feet against her back to start pulling, feeling her vertebrae rip apart as it tore off her head, her body collapsing to the ground.

It fell upon her corpse, swallowing down chunks of flesh as scarlet flames poured from its jaws to consume her body, devouring her essence, its own torn body healing as it fed.

It finished within moments, leaving nothing of Echidna but her severed head, the flames drawing back into its maw without so much as a speck of ash left behind.

It reached into its jacket to grab its shades, unfolding them with a flick of its wrist before placing them back on its face, then reaching back in to click the player off.

It moved to pick up her head, which had shrunken back to human size, using its thumb to strip her flesh, first piercing with a claw before dragging its thumb against bone to peel off long strips to eat.

It moved back, through the path of broken trees, burning grass and torn-up earth their brawl had created. It looked up at the Arch, wondering if Percy or Aella had finished the Chimera yet.

Then it looked down at its meal and decided it needed lemon juice.

 **3rd Person Aella POV, Earlier, Atop the Arch**

She briefly looked at the hole Papa had made before returning her full attention to the mix-and-match cat and Seabiscuit.

She wasn't worried about Papa, she doubted that lapdog of Olympus would even last five minutes. (・ω・)

She remembered Papa wanted to know how Seabiscuit would do in a one-on-one fight, so she would wait to see, and would tell him later. ò_ó

She hoped he didn't win, though. She was hungry, and the cat looked tasty!

Seabiscuit noticed the cat was distracted from Papas attack on the fat worm, so he tried to move. Unfortunately for him, the cat noticed and charged him first. He managed to dodge and ended up next to the terrified humans.

Seabiscuit seemed to find his nerve from seeing those humans, and he drew his sword after moving away from them, yelling, "Hey, Chihuahua!"

It turned suprisingly quickly in the relatively small space, before opening its mouth and shooting a blast(Mama says it's a column!) of flame at Seabiscuit.

He dove under the flames, the heat setting the carpet ablaze as the fire whooshed and fooshed and booshed, melting a hole in the wall.

Seabiscuit managed to stand, turning and slashing at the cats neck. Buuut, it would seem that today celestial bronze decided to be useless against rhinestone, the blade sparking harmlessly off the collar. õ_o?

While Seabiscuit lamented this discovery, the cats snake tail bit him, fangs sinking into his calf.

She briefly wondered if he would utilize his hydrokinesis to blast the venom back through the snakes skull, but . . . no, no he wasn't. -_-

So far, this was rather one-sided, and she wanted them to hurry up so she could have a go, but she knew better.

You absolutely don't step into one-on-one fights. Both Mama and Papa said so! ò_ó

Seabiscuit tried to stab the cat in its mouth, but the tail wrapped around his leg and pulled him off balance, sending his sword flying out the hole in the wall. He backed up to the hole, and the cat followed, growling, smoke curling from its lips.

She had hunted and slayed, been hunted and slain, and she easily recognized the fear that Seabiscuit was feeling right now.

Seabiscuit backed up even further, trying to keep an eye on the cat and glance at the river at the same time, and coming to a decision, said, "Father, help me," before jumping as the cat released its fire breath.

Through a window, she watched him fall, and apparently someone was looking out for him as he somehow didn't fall straight down to splatter(or plap) on the grass and stone below, instead arcing out to the river.

The cat moved forward to watch his fall through the hole, huffing in annoyance as it saw him land in the river, before turning back, no doubt intending to go help its mother against Papa.

It halted as it saw her sitting in the middle of the hallway, blocking its path with her current form. She smiled, a cruel hunger entering her eyes as she stared straight at it.

Now that Seabiscuit was done, she could eat! ❤

Her body changed, growing from a kit to a vixen the size of a cheetah, her front paws shifting so they looked more like clawed hands, her luxurious crimson fur growing into a regal mane around her neck(1), and her torso changed to be slightly more humanoid, complete with full shoulders, all while she maintained her sitting position.

Her blue, slitted eyes remained locked on the larger beast throughout the change.

It snorted, no doubt annoyed at her. Its tail twitched forward, and she acted. With blinding speed, she shot forward, passing its body and seizing the snake head in her hand, crushing it in her grip, blood spurting out between her fingers.

She landed behind it, assuming the same sitting position, the only difference being the single hand she had raised as she licked the blood off, and it was only now the cat processed what had happened.

It cast its gaze around for a moment, wondering where she had gone before turning to face her, looking soooo sloooow to her eyes that she saw nearly five hundred different chances to end its life before it finished, looking dumbfounded at her speed and the ruined mess of its tail, before looking at her, seeing her hungry, unblinking gaze.

It growled, angry now instead of annoyed, and tried to charge her. She dashed forward again, this time slashing into its front right leg just as it lifted it, tearing muscle and severing tendons, before jumping back into the same spot and sitting.

It didn't realize the damage until it tried to put its leg down, the ruined limb crumpling under its weight. It looked down in shock at its hamstrung leg, before looking back up at her. She knew that it hadn't even seen her move.

And she kept staring at it, her blue eyes like an ocean abyss.

Now there was fear in its eyes as it tried to back away.

Ah, ah, ah!

Once more she moved faster than it could see, darting under its body to tear at the leg it tried to start with, the back left one.

She ripped muscle from bone as she passed before jumping up and onto the ceiling, pushing off to land on its back before leaping back and turning to assume the same position, too light and fast for it to even feel her.

It kept its gaze on that same spot, her sheer speed making it seem like she was sitting there the whole time, and again it didn't notice what she had done until it tried to finish the move, resulting in the cat falling onto its side, roaring in agony.

Now it was panicked, and now it opened its mouth to try fire.

She shot forward and thrust a hand into its mouth, her claws turning down to pierce through its tongue and bottom jaw before pulling, yanking it up off the ground before withdrawing her hand and seizing it by the throat, aiming its head up.

Oooh, it managed to breathe its fire even through the pain, a column of flame roaring from its throat to melt a hole through the ceiling.

She slammed it back down, its jaw audibly shattering against the ground.

It looked up at her, and despair mixed in with the terror as it saw that same ravenous abyss staring back.

Now she smiled, her lips pulling back to reveal an array of curved, snow-white daggers.

Time to eat! ❤

She opened her jaws, sinking her teeth into the side of the cats torso, just above its belly, cracking its ribs. It yowled and tried to kick her with one of its good legs, but she lashed out and tore through its knee with a single strike before piercing its struggling body with her other arm, her claws piercing its hide.

She smiled around each mouthful, a look of pure, innocent joy on her face at the taste of the meat, absolutely soaked with terror and dopamine.

The cat continued howling and roaring as she ate it alive, completely unconcerned with her preys pain.

* * *

At the bottom of the Arch, an elevator door opened, revealing a small crimson-furred fox kit with half of a dead diamondback snake in her mouth. She moved off in a jaunty trot, looking for her Papa.

* * *

1 = Think Toriko battle wolf.

Ideas, feedback and amusing flames are appreciated.


	5. Chapter 5

I do not own any material from either Warhammer, Percy Jackson and the Olympians or any other franchise mentioned, implied and/or used in this story. Please support the official release.

The opinions of Anicetus are not necessarily shared by the writer.

Poor flames will be ignored, while sufficiently amusing ones may be stolen and used in this story. So be creative. :}

 **Chapter 5**

Having left the now burning portion of the park, it was strolling back towards the Arch to find its daughter. By now it had worked Echidnas skull down to her upper jaw, having already eaten her teeth.

It saw that the Arch was surrounded by several emergency vehicles with police helicopters circling overhead. It wondered how they had gotten here so quickly.

It moved through the crowd of onlookers, its attention focused on the adorable bundle of red fur currently trotting towards it through the legs of said crowd, dragging part of a dead snake in her mouth.

Holding off on the last piece of bone, it crouched down to pick up Aella, holding her in the air and smiling as it asked her, "Did you have fun?" She raised a little paw and made a so-so motion. _"He tasted great after I prepped him, Papa, but not much fun."_

"Oh, well I'm sorry for that." It said, depositing her back on its shoulder, the snake in her mouth laying over its chest. "So how did the kid do?"

She grimaced around her mouthful at the question. "That bad, huh?" She nodded. _"Seabiscuit showed absolutely no imagination, no ingenuity, he didn't even try to take advantage of the cats size in that place. Just basic swordplay."_

 _"He wasn't completely worthless though, he didn't just cower in the corner. He does seem to have some real strength to him, though he seems to be one of those that needs an excuse for it."_

It 'hmn'-ed at the information, and spotting Percy through the crowd, moved to meet him, hearing a news woman reporting on the event: "Probably not a terrorist attack, we're told, but it's still very early in the investigation. The damage, as you can see, is very serious. We're trying to get to some of the survivors, to question them about eyewitness reports of the three who supposedly fell from the Arch."

It saw Percys relief at the word 'survivors', most likely concerned about the humans who had been with them. He tried to push through the crowd to get a better look.

". . . adolescent boys," another reporter was saying, "Channel Five has learned that surveillance cameras show one of the duo assaulting a woman, somehow forcing her through the wall of the Arch, before the other went wild on the observation deck, somehow setting off this freak explosion. Hard to believe, John, but that's what we're hearing. Meanwhile, there have been reports of wild animals rampaging through the park, but thankfully, no confirmed fatalities. . ."

It saw Percy trying to inconspicously back away from the police line, and it went after him. After he managed to circle the perimeter, there was a bleating cry of, "Perrr-cy!" as Grover tackled him with a bear hug, before saying, "We thought you'd gone to Hades the hard way!"

It made its presence known with, "Wouldn't him dying be the easy way?"

Annabeth looked at it and Percy, trying to look angry but seeming relieved that Percy was alright.

Don't you fucking try to pretend she cares about it.

"We can't leave you two alone for five minutes! What happened?"

"I sort of fell," Percy said, shrugging nervously.

"Percy! Six hundred and thirty feet?" she said, exasperated, before turning to it with, "And what about you?"

"Well, I faced off with Echidna in the park and kicked her ass, and after Percy somehow long-jumped into the river, Aella here finished off the Chimera." It said, and Aella, projecting her voice into their minds, said, _"I got to eat him!"_ , showing off her snake, her little tail wagging as the trio gawked at them.

Behind them, a cop shouted, "Gangway!" The crowd parted, and a couple of paramedics hustled out, rolling a woman on a stretcher. It recognized her as the mother on the observation deck. She was saying, "And then this lion, this huge fire-breathing lion-"

"Okay, ma'am," the paramedic said. "Just calm down. Your family is fine. The medication is starting to kick in."

"I'm not crazy! She had snake eyes, and fangs and scales, and then he kicked her through the wall, and the other boy jumped out the hole and the fox-" Then she spotted the group. "There they are! That's them!"

Aella stood up on her hind legs, cheerily waving a paw at her. _"Hi, crazy lady!"_

Percy quickly turned and dragged Annabeth and Grover with him as it followed, disappearing into the crowd.

"What's going on?" Annabeth demanded. "Why was she talking about a lion?" Turning to it, "And what were you saying about Echidna?"

"The fat woman was Echidna and her dog was the Chimera. _As I already said,_ I fought and killed Echidna in the park while Aella finished the Chimera." It summarized before popping the last piece of jawbone into its mouth, while the trio stared at it and its daughter with expressions that ranged from awe to disbelief.

I leave you to guess who felt what.

"You two slew Echidna _and_ the Chimera?" Grover asked, shocked. "That-that's amazing! Very few heroes have ever managed to pull that off!"

Looking at the small fox on its shoulder, Annabeth asked, "How could she have defeated the Chimera?"

Looking at Annabeth, she responded with, _"I took advantage of my smaller size, superior speed and the small space of the observation deck to cripple its tail and limbs before finishing the cat off."_

Annabeth just stared at the response from the adorable kit.

The adorable kit stared back, her little tail wagging.

Next, Percy recounted his events, such as his high-dive act and receiving a message from what sounded like a nymph.

"Woah," Grover said. "We've got to get you to Santa Monica! You can't just ignore a summons from your dad."

Before Annabeth could respond, they passed another reporter doing a news break, and the trio froze when he said, "Anicetus. That's right, Dan. Channel Twelve has learned that one of the two boys that caused the explosion fits the description of a young man wanted by authorities internationally for his involvement with the terrorist organization, the 'Luceres.'"

"He is wanted for arson, destruction of property, eco-terrorism, mass-murder, manslaughter and criminal anarchy. He is believed to be traveling west, and is to be considered unarmed but extremely dangerous. While the identity of his companion is currently unknown, for our viewers at home, here is a photo of Anicetus."

The three turned to stare at it, and it stared back for several moments.

". . . What? I have a life outside of you people."

Annabeth blinked before saying, "I think we're more concerned with the fact that you're, oh, I don't know, A TERRORIST!?

"Hey, I am not a terrorist." It said. "I don't do politics."

"What!?"

"Going by the definition of the word, one has to have political aims to be a terrorist. I don't really work political, mostly just 'fuck off and/or die' so it would be a bit more accurate to call me an anarchist/mass-murderer."

It saw her and Percy reaching for their weapons, forcing a condescending look onto its face.

Aella was ignoring the commotion and playing with her food, batting at the snake to make it swing like a pendelum.

"Do you _really_ think that two half-baked runts, even working together, could take _me_ in a fight? Or, for that matter, that you have enough spare time to be getting your asses handed to you?"

It raised a hand to point at the police line to their side. "I do believe our train will be leaving soon, and while I am more than powerful enough, even in this state, to tear through everyone here, I don't think you have what it takes to escape the police, especially not after facing off with me."

Its face twisted into a lop-sided smirk. "Of course, that's assuming you survive."

Annabeths hand froze, and it could see her trying to calculate the odds of escaping if they got dragged into a fight with it, her eyes darting to the nearby police officers. Percy and Grover were eyeing her, waiting for her to make a call.

She glared at it and moved her hand away from her dagger, "This isn't over," she told it.

With the same mocking smile on its face, "Yes it is. Now let's go, Bettie, the viewers are waiting!" it said while walking off, Annabeth glaring at its back.

They managed to return to the Amtrak station without being spotted, boarding the train just before it pulled out for Denver, and leaving St. Louis behind.

* * *

The next day, June 14, seven days before the childrens solstice deadline, the train arrived in Denver. The trio hadn't eaten since the night before in the dining car (despite Aella kindly offering to share her snake).

"Let's try to contact Chiron," Annabeth said. "I want to tell him about your talk with the river spirit, and our _traveling companions._ "

"We can't use phones right?" Percy asked.

"I'm not talking about phones," Annabeth replied.

They wandered the town for about half an hour before finding an empty do-it-yourself carwash, choosing the stall furthest from the street. The trio were trying to keep an eye out for patrol cars, while it sat down, cross-legged, and was using one hand to play-wrestle with Aella, cooing at its daughter.

"What exactly are we doing?" Percy asked Grover as he took out the spray gun.

"It's seventy-five cents," Grover grumbled, ignoring his friends question. "I've only got about two quarters left. Annabeth?"

"Don't look at me," she said. "The dining car wiped me out."

It reached one hand into its jacket to check for change, the other had Aella biting down on its middle finger while using her paws to subdue two more, although its pinky managed to pin down her tail.

Finding a quarter, it tossed the coin to Grover, who said, "Excellent. We could do it with a spray bottle, of course, but the connection isn't as good, and my arm gets tired of pumping."

Fuck you. You, fuck you for making that joke.

"What are you talking about?" Percy asked.

Seeing as they apparently forgot that Percy was still new to this world, it answered, "Iris-messaging. The rainbow goddess carries messages for Olympians, and is usually willing to do the same for demigods."

It began humming **Rainbow in the Dark** as it turned the tables on Aella, pinning her on her back, although she wasn't going down easy, now gnawing on its pointer finger while using her little arms to fend off its thumb and middle.

Percy stared, seeming to have trouble processing that info, before asking, "You summon a goddess with a spray gun?"

Grover pointed the nozzle in the air and water hissed out in a thick white mist. "Unless you know an easier way to make a rainbow."

As the late afternoon light filtered through the vapors, Annabeth held out her palm to Percy. "Drachma, please."

After he handed it over, she raised the coin over her head. "O goddess, accept our offering."

She threw the drachma into the rainbow, the coin disappearing in a golden shimmer. "Half-Blood Hill," Annabeth requested of the visual illusion.

Through the mist, it could see a porch, strawberry fields and several islands it recognized as the Long Island Sound.

Standing at the porch railing was a blonde-haired young man wearing shorts and an orange tank top, holding a bronze sword and staring intently at something off-screen.

It wondered if anyone used Iris-messaging to jumpscare people as Aella managed to escape its pin, and was now sitting on its arm, trying to bend its hand back.

"Luke!" Percy yelled, and Luke turned, his eyes wide.

"Percy!" His face broke into a grin. "Is that Annabeth, too? Thank the gods! Are you guys okay?"

"We're . . . uh . . . fine," Annabeth stammered. She was suddenly straightening her dirty T-shirt, trying to comb the loose hair out of her face. "We thought - Chiron - I mean-"

"You want me to distract him while you freshen up, Bettie?" It asked with no subtlety whatsoever, getting her to attempt a death glare on it.

It was completely ineffective.

". . . He's down at the cabins." Luke said, now looking at it. "We're having some issues with the campers. Who is that? Is everything cool with you? Is Grover all right?"

Placing a hand on its chest, it said, "Anicetus," before raising its arm to show its child, now hanging from said arm and trying to overthrow its hand from below. "Aella."

I'm right here," Grover called. He held the nozzle out to one side and stepped into Luke's line of sight. "He's part of why we called . . . wait, what kind of issues?"

Just then a big Lincoln Continental pulled into the car wash with its stereo turned to maximum hip-hop. It slid into the next stall, the bass from the subwoofers vibrating the pavement. Nothing interesting, just basic rap.

"Chiron had to - what's that noise?" Luke yelled.

"I'll take care of it!" Annabeth yelled, looking very relieved to have an excuse to get out of her crushes line-of-sight. "Grover, come on!"

"What?" Grover said. "But -"

"Give Percy the nozzle and come on!" she ordered.

Grover muttered that girls were harder to understand than the Oracle at Delphi, then he handed Percy the spray gun and followed Annabeth.

It raised a brow and wondered how someone who had shown he could read emotions couldn't understand what just happened. It just filed it under the lack of common sense that the Grecians seemed to revel in.

Percy readjusted the hose so he could keep the rainbow going and still see Luke.

"Chiron had to break up a fight," Luke shouted to Percy over the music. "Things are pretty tense here, Percy. Word leaked out about the Zeus - Poseidon standoff. We're not sure how - probably the same scumbag who summoned the hellhound. Now the campers are starting to take sides. It's shaping up like the Trojan War all over again. Aphrodite, Ares, and Apollo are backing Poseidon, more or less. Athena is backing Zeus."

Percy shuddered at that. In the other stall, we could hear Annabeth and the Lincoln driver arguing with each other, before the music's volume decreased drastically. It kept its eye on Luke from behind its shades.

"So what's your status?" Luke asked. "And what's the story with this guy?"

Percy told him just about everything, including his dreams and, after glancing warily at it, just to see it shrug, their news discovery about Anicetus. Percy seemed happy to see Luke, and kept talking until the beeper went off on the spray machine.

"I wish I could help," Luke told Percy. "There's not much we can do from here, but listen . . . it had to be Hades who took the master bolt. He was there at Olympus. I was chaperoning a field trip and we saw him."

"But Chiron said the gods can't take each other's magic item directly."

It snorted at the mention of the vermins "symbols of power."

"That's true," Luke said, looking troubled. "Still . . . Hades has the helm of darkness. How could anyone else sneak into the throne room and steal the master bolt? You'd have to be invisible."

The two were silent for a moment, before Luke "seemed" to realize what he had implied.

"Oh, hey," he protested. "I didn't mean Annabeth. She and I have known each other forever. She would never . . . I mean, she's like a little sister to me."

And yet, with this brief interaction, it would bet it already knew more about this boy than Annabeth did.

It had experience with many cultists, beings that had to hide their thoughts and emotions on worlds where their own family would sell them out, and said thoughts and emotions could get them tortured to death or burnt at the stake.

And then there's Druchii/Drukhari politics.

Compared to that, this kid was an open book. Besides, even without him being here, it could easily pick out the hatred this boy had hidden away.

In the next stall, the music stopped, before a man screamed in terror, car doors slammed shut, and the Lincoln peeled out of the car wash.

"You'd better go see what that was," Luke said. "Listen, are you wearing the flying shoes? I'll feel better if I know they've done you some good."

"Oh . . . uh, yeah!" Percy lied, trying not to sound guilty. "Yeah, they've come in handy."

Why would anyone give flying shoes to a child of Poseidon, given Sparkys bitch-fits?

It would get it if they were realized, realized demigods being too strong for Sparky, but then again, they wouldn't have much use for flying shoes if they were.

"Really?" He grinned. "They fit and everything?"

The water shut off, and the mist started to evaporate.

"Well, be careful out there in Denver," Luke said, not-so-subtly glancing at it as his voice got fainter. "And tell Grover it'll be better this time! Nobody will get turned into a pine tree if he just -"

His voice cut off as the mist disappeared.

Annabeth and Grover came around the corner, laughing, but stopped when they saw Percy's face. Annabeth's smile faded. "What happened, Percy? What did Luke say?"

"Not much," he lied, glancing at it and seeming thankful it didn't contradict him. "Come on, let's find some dinner."

* * *

A few minutes later, they were sitting in a booth inside a 5 & Diners. All around them, families were eating burgers and drinking malts and sodas.

The waitress came over, an eyebrow raised skeptically. "Well?"

It was looking over its menu as Percy said, "We, um, want to order dinner."

"You kids have enough to pay for it?"

It reached into its jacket and pulled out a cyclops/leucrota leather wallet and opened it to show her several hundred dollars worth of twenties, before saying, "You tell me."

The trio gaped at its wallet, apparently shocked that it had money. The waitress seemed rather eager to take the order now.

It tucked its wallet back into its jacket and made to order, but then it paused as it picked up a familiar essence.

The building rumbled as a large motorcycle pulled up to the curb. All conversation in the diner stopped. The motorcycle's headlights glared red. Its gas tanks had flames painted on it, and a shotgun holster riveted to either side, complete with shotguns. The seat appeared to be made of Caucasian human skin.

The rider was a tall, powerfully muscled male. He was dressed in a red muscle shirt, black jeans and a black leather duster. He had an oily black crew cut and cheeks scarred from many fights, and was wearing red, wraparound shades.

As he walked in, a hot, dry wind blew through the diner. All the people rose, with blank looks on their faces, but the Olympian waved his hand dismissively and they sat back down to continue their conversations. The waitress blinked, before adopting the same skeptical look from earlier, asking, "You kids have the money to pay for it?"

Ares said, "It's on me." before sliding into the booth, forcing Annabeth to scooch over.

He looked up at the waitress, who was gaping at him, and said, "Are you still here?"

He pointed at her, and she stiffened, before turning and marching back towards the kitchen.

Ares looked at Percy, and without even facing at him, it could sense his anger, resentment and bitterness growing from Ares' aura.

He gave Percy a wicked grin. "So you're old Seaweed's kid, huh?"

"What's it to you?"

Annabeth said, "Percy, this is -"

Ares raised a hand. "S'okay. I don't mind a little attitude. Long as you remember who's the boss. You know who I am, little cousin?"

Percy seemed to realize who he was talking to. "You're Clarisse's dad. Ares, god of war."

It thought to itself, "A watered-down one."

Ares grinned and removed his shades. He had burning red fires in place of eyes. "That's right, punk. I heard you broke Clarisse's spear."

"She was asking for it."

It cut in here, "While I'm sure that "Demigrassi" is a very fun program, why don't we get to what one of the more decent Olympians wants with the kids."

Ares turned to look at it, and it noticed the look of vague recognition that crossed his face. "Do I know you, punk?"

It felt Ares' aura washing over it, trying to stoke its rage. However, at its calmest it had a nastier temper than anything Ares could cause, so it had about the same effect as tossing embers into a volcano.

It shrugged. "Technically, although I am more familiar with your _other half."_

His brow rose in understanding. "So what's one of you western ones want with these three?"

"Oh, don't worry, I'm just looking for a bit of fun, and I thought this whole prophecy nonsense might fit the bill. Anyways, what do _you_ want with Larry, Moe and Curly here?"

Ares nodded at that, unwilling (just not caring enough) to expose more to the confused looking children. "I heard they were in town." He turned back to Percy. "I got a little proposition for you."

The waitress came back with heaping trays of food - cheeseburgers, fries, onion rings, and chocolate shakes.

Fuck, their cook is fast.

Before she could leave, it asked her, "Could I get potato skins and mozzarrela sticks with that, please?"

She nodded, looking nervously at Ares before turning back to place its order.

"My proposition is simple. I want you to do me a favor," the Grecian war god told Percy.

"What favor could I do for a god?"

"Something a god doesn't have time to do himself. I left my shield at an abandoned water park here in town. I was going on a little . . . date with my girlfriend. We were interrupted. I left my shield behind. I want you to fetch it for me."

"Why don't you go back and get it yourself?"

The fire in his sockets glowed a little hotter.

"Why don't I turn you into a prairie dog and run you over with my Harley? Because I don't feel like it. A god is giving you an opportunity to prove yourself, Percy Jackson. Will you prove yourself a coward?" He leaned forward. "Or maybe you only fight when there's a river to dive into, so your daddy can protect you."

It could see how badly Ares' aura was affecting Percy. "We're not interested. We've already got a quest."

Aella and it were calmly eating their meals as they watched the conversation play out.

"I know all about your quest, punk. When that _item_ was first stolen, Zeus sent his best out looking for it: Apollo, Athena, Artemis," it had to suppress a growl at the name of **_that wretched bitch_** , "and me, naturally. If I couldn't sniff out a weapon that powerful . . ." He licked his lips, as if the very thought of the master bolt made him hungry. "Well . . . if I couldn't find it, you got no hope. Nevertheless, I'm trying to give you the benefit of the doubt. Your dad and I go way back. After all, I'm the one who told him my suspicions about old Corpse Breath."

"You told him Hades stole the bolt?"

"Sure. Framing somebody to start a war. Oldest trick in the book. I recognized it immediately. In a way, you got me to thank for your little quest."

Hint, oh-so-unsubtle-fucking hint.

"Thanks," Percy grumbled.

"Hey, I'm a generous guy. Just do my little job, and I'll help you on your way. I'll arrange a ride west for you and your friends."

"We're doing fine on our own," Percy said through clenched teeth.

"Yeah, right. No money. No wheels. No clue what you're up against. Help me out, and maybe I'll tell you something you need to know. Something about your mom."

Percy's eyes widened. "My mom?" he asked, trying not to sound desperate.

Ares grinned. "That got your attention. The water park is a mile west on Delancy. You can't miss it. Look for the Tunnel of Love ride."

"What interrupted your date?" Percy asked. "Something scare you off?"

Ares bared his teeth, seeming slightly nervous. But as it looked at his face, it felt that the nervousness seemed off, forced. Now why would he be trying to fake that?

"You're lucky you met me, punk, and not one of the other Olympians. They're not as forgiving of rudeness as I am. I'll meet you back here when you're done. Don't disappoint me."

Then he flashed out, his motorcycle disappearing with him. It briefly tracked his essence as it continued to eat, reaching over to wipe a stray bit of ketchup from Aella's head.

"Not good," Grover said. "Ares sought you out, Percy. This is not good."

Percy stared out the window, turning the conversation over in his head. "It's probably some kind of trick," he said. "Forget Ares. Let's just go."

"We can't," Annabeth said. "Look, I hate Ares as much as anybody, but you can't ignore the gods unless you want serious bad fortune. He wasn't kidding about turning you into a rodent."

He looked down at his cheeseburger. "Why does he need us?"

"Maybe it's a problem that requires brains," Annabeth said. "Ares has strength. That's all he has. Even strength has to bow to wisdom sometimes."

"Don't be stupid, Bettie," it said, getting the three to turn to it, Annabeth with a slight glare. "Just because your mother is touted as the goddess of wisdom doesn't mean that Ares doesn't have anything in his skull."

"Of course a thug like you would defend him," Annabeth shot back. "And where did you get all that money? Robbing banks?"

"No, I record my antics and other events, such as your little quest, cut them up, and sell them online as pay-per-view episodes." As was quickly becoming a tired theme, they blinked at that response. "And yes, I _am_ a thug. Do you know what a thug is? A real thug, Bettie, not just some half-assed punk with a bandana who's never been in a real fight without three other pricks backing him."

It smiled as it recalled a line from one of its favorite literary series, paraphrasing it for its own use, "A thug, Bettie, is a killer, a brute, conscienceless and efficient. I'm a thug, and so is Aella."

Aella had her face buried in a cheeseburger, trying to catch an elusive pickle.

Oh, wait, she got it, pulling back with said pickle in her mouth, suddenly wearing a little "thug life" shirt.

So adorbs. Much cute.

It continued its point with, "And I rather enjoy being a thug. And while it's fun to go in Leeroy Jenkins guns-a-blazing, I find it makes me a better thug to actually apply my intelligence to the problem, instead of _just assuming_ that I'm automatically smarter than others and claiming that that is wisdom, as it helps thugs like me and brats like you to live longer."

She seemed cowed by its little lecture, losing her attitude as it leaned in and said, "So what do you _think_ would make Ares behave like that?"

Annabeth glanced at the other two nervously.

Annabeth said, "I-I'm afraid we'll have to find out."

* * *

The sun was sinking behind the Rocky Mountains by the time we located the water park. Judging from the worn-down sign, it used to be called WATERLAND, but now it read WAT R A D. Aella was asleep in its fur-lined hood, belly-up with her little legs hanging in the air.

The main gate was padlocked and topped with barbed wire. Inside, huge dry waterslides and tubes and pipes curled everywhere, leading to empty pools. Old tickets and advertisements fluttered around the asphalt.

"If Ares brings his girlfriend here for a date," Percy said, staring up at the barbed wire, "I'd hate to see what she looks like."

"Percy," Annabeth warned, "Be more respectful."

"Why? I thought you hated Ares."

"He's still a god. And his girlfriend is very tempermental."

"You don't want to insult her looks," Grover added.

"Who is she? Echidna?"

"No, Aphrodite," Grover said, a little dreamily, "Goddess of love."

"I thought she was married to someone," Percy said. "Hephaestus."

"What's your point?" Grover asked.

It called back, "His point is that he's a decent enough person that he believes marriage vows should mean something."

It looked over its shoulder at Grover, "And that little question doesn't bode well for your own love life." Grover sputtered at that.

It heard Percy ask, "So how do we get in?"

It reached out to grab the padlock, squeezing down on the chunk of metal and seeing it deform in its grasp, tearing it off before yanking the now loose chain from the gate and pulling it open. It entered the park with the children following.

The shadows grew long as we walked through the park, observing the attractions. There was Ankle Biter Island, Head Over Wedgie and Dude, Where's My Swimsuit?

They soon found a souvenir shop that had been left open. Merchandise still lined the shelves: snow globes, pencils, postcards, and racks of -

"Clothes," Annabeth said. "Fresh clothes."

"Yeah," Percy said. "But you can't just -"

"Watch me," she said, Grover shrugging and joining her before Percy followed.

It spoke up in a Morgan Freeman voice, "And with that, Annabeth realized that she _liked_ the thrill of stealing, and her downward spiral into a life of crime began. Years from now, as she was crouched in a bar with her loot and surrounded by officers of the law, she would look back and realize that _this_ was the moment it all went wrong."

They looked at it, "What are you doing?"

"Narrating a more interesting story."

". . . Just - just stop, An."

"Never."

After the trio were decked out like walking advertisements for the defunct park, we continued our search for the Tunnel of Love.

"So, Ares and Aphrodite," Percy said, "they have a thing going?"

"That's old gossip, Percy," Annabeth replied. "Three-thousand-year-old gossip."

"What about Aphrodite's husband?"

"Well, you know," she said. "Hephaestus. The blacksmith. He was crippled when he was a baby, thrown off Mount Olympus by Zeus." It wondered where she had heard that Zeus did it. "So he isn't exactly handsome. Clever with his hands, and all, but Aphrodite isn't into brains and talents, you know?"

"She likes bikers."

"Whatever."

"Hephaestus knows?"

It wondered why they didn't just get a divorce. It seems like that would be more practical than this nonsense. Maybe Aphrodite just got off on the scandal, even after what little flair it had had long since wore off.

But then, there's quite a bit about the idiocy of Olympians it doesn't understand, nor wants to understand.

"Oh sure," Annabeth said. "He caught them together once. I mean, literally caught them, in a golden net, and invited all the gods to come and laugh at them. Hephaestus is always trying to embarass them. That's why they meet in out-of-the-way places, like . . ."

"Like this," it finished for her.

Ahead of us was an empty, bowl-shaped pool, about fifty yards across. It could see light playing off a row of mirrors just inside the rim on the opposite side.

Around the rim, a dozen bronze statues of baby Cupid stood guard with wings spread and bows ready to fire. Across the pool was a tunnel, with a sign above it that read, THRILL RIDE O' LOVE: THIS IS NOT YOUR PARENTS' TUNNEL OF LOVE!

It moved forward to look in the pool.

At the bottom was a pink-and-white two-seater with a canopy over the top and hearts painted on. In the left seat rested Ares' shield, a polished bronze disc, a silk scarf laying next to it. Its eyes narrowed behind its shades as it spotted a lighter glint over the shield and the dashboard.

"This is too easy," Percy said. "So we just walk down and get it?"

Annabeth ran her fingers along the base of the nearest Cupid statue. "There's a Greek letter carved here," she said. "Eta. I wonder . . ."

"Grover," Percy said, "you smell any monsters?"

He sniffed the wind. "Nothing."

"Nothing - like, in-the-Arch-and-you-didn't-smell-Echidna nothing, or really nothing?"

Grover looked hurt, "I told you, that was underground!"

It turned from the pool to look at him, "You were over six hundred feet in the air, and that's not even counting when you were standing right next to them in the elevator."

His expression changed from hurt to embarrassed. "But this time he's correct, I haven't picked up the scent of anything alive. Of course, that doesn't guarantee nothing is here, just narrows the options."

Percy sighed, "I'm going down there."

"I'll go with you." Grover didn't sound too enthusiastic, but most likely wanted to make up for what had happened in St. Louis.

"No,"Percy told him. "I want you to stay up top with the flying shoes. You're the Red Baron, a flying ace, remember? I'll be counting on you for backup, in case something goes wrong."

Note how he's already decided they can't rely on it.

Not a bad assumption.

Grover puffed up his chest a little. "Sure. But what could go wrong?"

It stated, "Meteors." They just stared at it. "Meteors could fall from the sky to kill you."

". . . I just have a feeling, so i want you to watch our backs." Percy said. "Annabeth, come with me -"

"Are you kidding?" She looked at him incredulously, her cheeks flushed red.

"What's the problem now?" Percy demanded.

"Me, go with you to the . . . the 'Thrill Ride of Love'? How embarrassing is that? What if somebody saw me?"

It raised a hand. "I will," and as she turned to glare at it, it reached over to grab Grovers wrist and lift his arm, "and I have Grover as a witness." Her glare turned murderous. "And all my viewers!"

"Shut! Up! An!" It just smiled.

Face red, Percy said, "Fine, I'll do it myself." But when he started sliding down the side of the pool, she followed, muttering about how boys always messed things up.

Affecting a Jamaican accent, it started singing, _"And you don't know why, but you're dying to try, you wanna kiss-the-girl."_

"I'm gonna kill him," the blonde growled.

"I'm sure you'll try!" It shouted down.

As the two reached the boat, it saw Percy notice the scarf and pick it up. A dreamy smile crossed his face and he was lifting it to nuzzle when Annabeth ripped it out of his hand and stuffed it into her pocket. "Oh, no you don't. Stay away from that love magic."

"That's right, Bettie, claim your man!"

"What?" Percy blinked.

"Bite me!" She yelled at the grinning psychopath before turning back to love-magic-dazed Percy. "Just get the shield, Seaweed Brain, and let's get out of here."

Percy reached out for the shield, his hand brushing against that other light, causing it to snap. Percy paused to look over the strand.

"Wait," Annabeth said.

It face(well, forehead)palmed.

"Too late," Percy said.

"There's another Greek letter on the side of the boat, another Eta. This is a trap."

. . . Wow. Just, wow.

"Yeah, you were right, Bettie. I doubt Ares would have ever been smart enough to half-assedly trigger the trap! Sheer genius!"

It imagined that, if she knew about such things, she would be flipping it off with both hands.

Grover yelled, "Guys!" as the obvious trap sprung, the sound of grinding gears nearly drowning him out.

The Cupid statues drew their bows before firing at one another, the arrows trailed thin cables as they sunk into the ground around the rim, before smaller metallic threads started weaving together between the main strands, forming a net.

"We have to get out," Percy said.

"Duh!" Annabeth said.

Percy grabbed the shield and the two ran, but steep slopes and gravity conspired against them.

"Come on!" Grover shouted, struggling to hold open a section of the net, but wherever he touched it, the golden threads started to wrap around his hands.

The statues heads popped open, revealing video cameras. Spotlights rose up as a loudspeaker voice boomed: "Live to Olympus in one minute . . . Fifty-nine seconds, fifty-eight . . ."

"Hephaestus!" Annabeth screamed. "I'm so stupid! Eta is 'H.' He made this trap to catch his wife with Ares. Now we're going to be broadcast to Olympus and look like absolute fools!"

It raised a brow. It could understand why she would think Hephaestus set this trap, she was probably too panicked (and too arrogant) to consider how one of Ares' personal items had been the trigger for this one, implying Ares himself had set it up.

My, my, now why would Ares repurpose one of Hephaestus' traps?

They almost made it to the rim when the mirrors slid open, allowing thousands of tiny clockwork spiders with oversized pincers to crawl out.

It ignored Annabeths freakout as it crouched to study the net. It reached down to tug at it, and felt it could easily rip it out and let them climb out on it.

As it looked back at Percy and Annabeth retreating from the bronze horde, it discarded the idea as it knew the spiders would swarm the net and them long before they could escape.

It heard Grover yell, "Maia!" as wings sprouted from his shoes. As he jumped to try to fly over the net, it grabbed him by the back of his shirt, dragging him back down. "What are you doing?! I have to help them!" the satyr yelled, struggling to escape its grip.

It brought him close and calmly said, "There's nothing you can do from here."

He is absolutely not strong enough to carry them out of the pit, and would just get mauled to death.

"So I should just let them die?! Let go of me you crazy freak!"

"No, just wait for your moment." Seeing that he wasn't listening, it narrowed its eyes and released a tiny burst of predatory hunger, causing him to freeze, trapped in shivering, slit-pupiled terror. Seeing this, it set him down and moved back to the pools edge. "Now wait."

It crouched down, watching as the two retreated to the boat, Percy kicking at the machines as Annabeth screamed, paralyzed by fear.

Annoyed at the countdown, it drew on other powers, a single eye changing behind its shades, amber brightening to gold as two silver rings slid out from the pupil, the outer ring growing four extensions that resembled cog-teeth, a single longer, thinner tooth on top and three shorter, thicker extensions growing from the bottom like cartoonish skull teeth.(1)

A pulse of energy spread out, too subtle for the three to sense, but it saw the machines in the pit pause for a nanosecond before it allowed them to continue, as it had other targets.

It shouted, "Percy!" and as it saw his head begin to rise, it yelled, "KEEP YOUR FOCUS ON THE ENEMY, BOY!", and saw his head jerk back down as he refocused on the spiders, while it exerted its control over the divine technology, "Seventeen, sixttteeeee. . ."

"You ain't getting back out this way, kid, not at your current level of power."

With a bit of ingenuity and control (or at least a basic fucking idea of how to use them), his powers should make this trap easy to escape.

But then again, he's a Grecian demigod.

Most of their ("godly") parents barely have any idea how to use their powers, and they grew up in this life, why the fuck would he have any idea with less than a month.

"THEN WHAT DO YOU SUGGEST I DO?!"

It sighed, before looked up in exasperation, suppressing the urge to summon alcohol.

With a "tsk" sound as it opened its mouth, "Percy."

"You're in a water park."

"You have the power to control water, and you're in a water park."

"What do YOU think you should do?"

He seemed to get it (pause for applause), closing his eyes in concentration.

It gazed down, wondering why he wasn't immediately swarmed and mutilated by the clockwork spiders, to see them pausing and milling around.

So, the Fates are covering for these brats, huh?

Might have to change that.

Satisfied(read: not as annoyed), it stepped back from the edge and reactivated the cameras, making them turn to it.

It smiled and said, "HELLOOO, OLYMPUS! Welcome to your first, and only, free clip of 'AA Adventures!' My name is Anicetus," sketch a bow, one arm over its chest with the other stretched out to its side. "and I will be your host for the next few minutes."

"I know you were expecting to see one of Hephaestus' traps, but we're doing this instead. Why? Because I hate freeloaders, so fuck you, that's why."

On the side, Grover was still petrified from its slight hunger pang.

Even if he was conscious, he would likely still be terrified that it would bring the wrath of Olympus down on them, under the impression that means a damn thing.

"In the pit behind the cameras, which I will not show you, because again, fuck you, is the latest couple on my show, which I have decided to name 'Bluebird', who are working to escape said pit."

"Why 'Bluebird'? Well, as my regular viewers know, I find the concept of labeling couples by mixing their names to almost always be a horrible idea, with rare exceptions such as 'the Shamy', as it is fucking lazy."

Here it raised a finger to the cameras, "And Aphrodite, you should feel FUCKING ASHAMED for promoting it! Shame, shame, sha- damn it, I would have brought a bell if I knew this was going to happen . . . fuck it, I'll improvise."

It altered the live feed so each 'shame' was accompanied by the ringing of a bell, "Shame, shame, shame, sha-" it paused, sensing Annabeth and Percy were reaching the closed end of the ride. "I'll be back in a second," it told the cameras before cutting the feed.

On their side, they would see a picture reading "We'll be right back!" with a chibi Anicetus mauling and chasing anatomically correct humanoids attempting to flee from the tiny terror, gold leaking from their wounds.

"Grover, come on!" snapping the satyr from his terrified stupor and getting him to run after it as it moved towards the chained gates of the 'Thrill Ride of Love', "They should be about to come flying either over or through that gate, and we are gonna catch 'em."

Grover nodded, saying, "Maia!" again before lifting off the ground. Moments later, the gates splintered and bent, water gushing through the new cracks as Percy and Annabeth came flying over the gates.

Grover, prepared, shot forward and grabbed Percy by his shirt and Annabeth by his arm, slowing their descent towards the asphalt. It moved forward with its arm raised, catching one in each as they drew near before letting them down. "So how was the ride?"

The two just laughed, no doubt still high on adrenaline.

It turned back, reactivating the cameras. "Welcome back, you lazy pricks! As you can see, our intrepid 'Bluebird' made it out okay! If you want to see more, as I will be partially blocking your usual means of viewing quests, you can watch them in episodes for the low price of exactly $5 each, no tax, at ' _www_. _aa-adventures/locheiaisaprat .com,'_ " it altered the feed so the web address would show up on their screens, "and yes, you do have to type in that last part to find the site, because it's fucking true."

"And with that, I'm just about done." It turned to the children gaping at it. "You kids got anything you wanna say to Olympus before I sign off?" They just slowly shook their heads. "Well, allright then."

"Well since that seems to be all, goodnight folks!" It sketched another bow. "We now return you to your regularly scheduled bullshit."

It ended the feed and deactivated the cameras, causing the statues to resume their previous positions and the spotlights to sink back into the ground. The park went quiet and dark again, except for the gentle trickle of water into the Thrill Ride of Love's pool.

It turned back to the children. "Well, that was entertaining. Ready to go, kids?" They spluttered, seeming shocked at how casual it was acting.

Annabeth managed to get it together, asking "What did you just do?!"

"Highjacked Olympus' television network, told them to go fuck themselves, what I have decided is the couple name for you and Percy, shamed Aphrodite for promoting laziness, called them lazy pricks, forced them to pay me for the privilege of being allowed to watch you guys," it looked over to the side, in the direction of Olympus, though the kids didn't know that, "and am currently wondering how all that didn't get a response from them."

It turned its head back to look at her. "Why, what'd you do?"

She just looked at it, shocked into silence, for several moments before she reached a revelation. "You're completely insane."

"Sanity is for the weak."

"What are you!? How did you do all that!?"

Here Grover piped up, seeming to have recovered enough of his nerve to stutter out, "A-a-are . . . are you . . . a god?"

". . . Haaah, I guess _you_ would say that."

Here Percy stepped up, angry. "You could have easily gotten us out of there, couldn't you?"

It looked right back at him and said, "Easier than you find blinking."

It saw the hit coming, remaining still as it allowed Percy's fist to slam into its face, knocking its shades off as it turned its head with the blow so he wouldn't break his hand.

"You jerk, we could have died!" Percy snarled at it. "Why didn't you help us?"

Its hand had easily caught its shades as they went flying, but it didn't reapply them right away, instead turning its head back to face Percy. It saw him flinch back as it gazed at him with its alien eyes, gold, silver and amber now boring into his very soul. Then it spoke.

"Because I'm not here to babysit you."

It looked up, sighing.

"Ever since I was born, I have lived by the same creed on both sides of my family."

It looked back down at the trio.

"We believe in survival of the fittest, and we cut down those that fail to meet this standard. And so I shall be with you three."

It stepped forward, forcing Percy back.

"I am not here to play nursemaid to you. While I have decided to aid you, you **will** ultimately survive or die by your own skills, your own power, your own strength."

"And if you prove to be just another spineless weakling, I'll just fucking kill you, and your soul won't be going to Hades when I do. No underworld, no elysium, just damnation, for despised are the weak, they who can never stand on their own."

It finally reapplied its shades, sparing them from its gaze.

"Conquer or die, it's as simple as that."

It looked at the stock-still children, frozen before what they feared was a wrathful god. "And so far, you have followed my expectations to the letter."

"Not good, but . . . barely acceptable, given your backgrounds. I would like to believe that there is some strength in you, even if that strength is mostly buried beneath Olympian weakness."

"But hopefully you'll be able to overcome that."

Now it stepped back, asking, "So once more kids, what's next?"

They just looked at each other, before Percy looked down at Ares' shield, and it could sense his anger. "We need to have a little talk with Ares."

* * *

SuperSaiyanDiclonius : You are partly correct, Anicetus is a child of Khorne, but are wrong about the identity of its mother. I have dropped more clues, including one near the end that should have all the subtlety of an Ork Burna-Boy.

I didn't say that its mother was the strongest in Greek mythology, in fact, she technically doesn't exist in the Greek mythos. There is only a single legend of her that I currently know of, but that one legend has had repercussions that resound through history to this day. What I meant was that the version that gave birth to Anicetus is simply the strongest version of her among all of her multiversal dopplegangers.

As for why Anicetus refers to itself as it, that is because, like daemons and the Chaos Gods, it does not possess an actual gender, but just like them, it usually chooses to appear as a male for rather simple, honestly petty reasons that will be revealed in "The Titan's Curse" portion of this story, so it just refers to itself as it.

It's been (I believe canonically) said that the Chaos Gods reflect whatever universe/multiverse they mostly interact with, and so the reason that they are such vicious, brutal monsters is because the universe of Warhammer, both fantasy and 40k, is a vicious, brutal place.

So by deduction, it stands to reason there is a female dominated portion of the Warhammer multiverse, and in fact probably cults or planets within the canon, where Khorne and the other Ruinous Powers (besides Slaanesh) appears as female, and it likely doesn't mean a damn thing to the Blood God. The only reason Anicetus even refers to Khorne as father is because that is how its mother thinks of him.

Hell, in the book for "Tamurkhan, The Throne of Chaos," a warhammer fantasy tabletop campaign, there is a Great Unclean One that is referred to as female, called the "Pox Mother."

Also thank you for telling me about your story. I left a suggestion, that I hope proves useful, for said story in your reviews.

1 = Who recognizes this symbol?

Also, I didn't realize I hadn't altered my settings to allow anonymous reviews until I was nearly finished with this chapter, so I apologize for that.

Ideas, feedback and amusing flames are appreciated.


	6. Chapter 6

I do not own any material from either Warhammer, Percy Jackson and the Olympians or any other franchise mentioned, implied and/or used in this story. Please support the official release.

The opinions of Anicetus are not necessarily shared by the writer.

Poor flames will be ignored, while sufficiently amusing ones may be stolen and used in this story. So be creative. :}

 **Chapter 6**

 **Grover POV**

The war god was waiting for us in the diner parking lot. Percy marched ahead, angry, Annabeth followed, worried about his temper, and _that thing_ stalked after them, its child still asleep in its hood.

I walked after them, trying to keep an eye on _that thing_ without looking directly at it. Trying not to run, as I so desperately wanted to, because I knew it would kill us all if I did.

"Well, well," Ares said. "You didn't get yourself killed."

"You knew it was a trap."

It looked at Percy. "Of course he did, why did you think he sent you?"

Ares gave it a wicked grin. "I would've paid to see the expression on that crippled blacksmiths face."

"Thank-you," _that thing_ said from the side. Ares just nodded at it before turning back to Percy, saying, "You looked good on tv, _Bluebird."_

Percy shoved Ares' shield at him. "You're a jerk."

I heard Annabeth catch her breath beside me.

Ares grabbed the shield and spun it in the air like pizza dough. It changed form, melting into a bulletproof vest. He slung it across his back.

"See that truck over there?" He pointed at an eighteen-wheeler parked across the street from the diner. "That's your ride. Take you straight to L.A., with one stop in Vegas."

The eighteen-wheeler had a sign on the back, written in reverse-printed white on black: KINDNESS INTERNATIONAL: HUMANE ZOO TRANSPORT. WARNING: LIVE WILD ANIMALS.

From the corner of my eye, I saw _that thing_ turn to look at the truck, and I saw its smile fall it observed the rig.

Percy said, "You're kidding."

Ares snapped his fingers. The back door of the truck unlatched. "Free ride west, punk. Stop complaining. And here's a little something extra for doing the job."

He swung a blue nylon backpack off his handlebars and tossed it to Percy. Inside were fresh clothes, twenty bucks in cash, a pouch full of golden drachmas, and a bag of Double Stuff Oreos.

Percy said, "I don't want your lousy -"

 _"Percy,"_ it cut him off. He turned to see _that thing_ looking square at the truck, a flat expression showing through the scars. "Stop complaining, take the bag, get your info, and _let's go."_

Percy gritted his teeth at that. Fortunately, he managed to control his temper and slung the backpack over his shoulder.

"You owe me one more thing," Percy told Ares, trying to keep his voice level. "You promised me information about my mother."

"You sure you can handle the news?" He kick-started his motorcycle. "She's not dead."

Percy seemed shocked. "What do you mean?"

"I mean she was taken away from the Minotaur before she could die. She was turned into a shower of gold, right? That's metamorphosis, not death. She's being kept."

"Kept? Why?"

"Leverage over you." _That thing_ said.

"He's right, punk. Hostages. You take somebody to control somebody else."

"Nobody's controlling me."

It said, "Me, him," jerking its head at Ares, "Zeus, Poseidon, Hades and the Fates. That's eight people, just off the top of me head."

Ares laughed at that. "See you around, kid."

Percy balled up his fists. "You're pretty smug, Lord Ares, for a guy who runs from Cupid statues."

Behind his sunglasses, fire glowed. I felt a hot wind pass by us. "We'll meet again, Percy Jackson. Next time you're in a fight, watch your back."

He revved his Harley, then roared off down Delaney Street.

Annabeth said, "That wasn't smart, Percy."

"I don't care."

"You don't want a god as your enemy. Especially not that god."

"Our drivers seem to be finishing their meal," it said. "Let's make sure we're not left behind."

We all looked towards the diner. At the register, the last two customers were paying their check, two men in identical black coveralls, with a white logo on the back that matched the one on the KINDNESS INTERNATIONAL truck.

"Let's go kids," it said, moving towards their new ride.

I absolutely hated the idea of being trapped in a metal box with _that thing,_ but Percy and Annabeth had already gone after it, and I couldn't leave them alone with it.

We ran across the street and climbed in the back of the big rig, closing the doors behind us.

* * *

The first thing that hit me was the putrid smell, as if the Nemean lion had been using this place as its litter box.

The trailer was dark inside until Percy uncapped Anaklusmos. The blade cast a faint bronze light over a very sad scene. Sitting in a row of filthy metal cages were three of the most pathetic zoo animals I'd ever beheld: a zebra, a male albino lion, and a waterbuck.

Someone had thrown the lion a sack of turnips, which he obviously didn't want to eat. The zebra and waterbuck had each gotten a styrofoam tray of hamburger meat. The zebra's mane was matted with chewing gum, like somebody had been spitting on it in their spare time. The waterbuck had a stupid silver birthday balloon tied to one of his horns that read OVER THE HILL!

Apparently, nobody had wanted to get close enough to the lion to mess with him, but the poor thing was pacing around on soiled blankets, in a space way too small for him, panting from the stuffy heat of the trailer. He had flies buzzing around his pink eyes and his ribs showed through his white fur.

The sight got me angry, angry enough that I briefly forgot about _that_ _thing_ beside me.

"This is kindness?" I growled. "Humane zoo transport?!"

Then it spoke, and as I remembered what it did, my anger vanished like I wanted to in the face of my fear.

"No." _That thing_ answered, and I stepped aside as it moved forward to get a closer look at the animals. Then the truck's engine roared to life, the trailer started shaking, and we were forced to sit down or fall down. It remained standing, unbothered by the sudden movement. " _This_ is simply the failure of a certain _**brat**_."

The sheer hate it infused in the word was near physically painful just to hear.

I curled up in the corner, still trying to not-quite watch _the thing._ Percy and Annabeth sat besides me.

We watched _that thing_ as it walked past the cages, observing the animals. They seemed transfixed, their eyes locked onto it . . . but they didn't look afraid. First it looked at the zebra, then the waterbuck, before turning on its heel to look at the lion.

Aella stirred, sitting up from its hood, yawning and blinking tiredly. As _that thing_ crouched in front of the lion's cage, she raised herself up, putting her paws on the back of its head and nuzzling into its hair. Then she scooched forward, looking at the lion over its head.

 _That thing_ reached out and grabbed the lock, tearing it off, opening the door and allowing the lion to walk out.

The big cat was happy to have room to stretch, popping his joints. Then he moved forward and sat before _that thing_ , which reached out, burying a gloved hand into the lions mane.

I wanted to shout, to warn the lion, to tell him to get away before it bit him, tore him, killed him, but the cry froze in my chest as its eyes glanced at me.

Those horrible, relentless eyes that I knew saw everything, every scrap and fiber of my being, as nothing but food.

It reached over and tore the locks off the zebra and waterbuck's cages, letting them out and dragging the mismatched food to the proper animals. As the three eagerly dug into their meals, _that thing_ audibly breathed, inhaling through its nose and exhaling through its mouth.

A golden-yellow radiance, like fire and lightning, shimmered into being around it, crackling and humming as the light spread over the three, lighting up the trailer.

The lion 'groo'-ed and the other two bleated joyfully as the light wrapped around them, their starved bodies filling out with muscle.

"What is this? _What is this?"_ I thought as I sensed the light. Even from here it was like pure nature, rich and warm and full of life unlike anything I had ever felt before. I didn't realize I was standing until he stopped glowing, the rich light fading away, and the feeling of nature going with it.

The thi . . . Anicetus raised a hand, and what looked like liquid metal flowed out of the gloves, forming steely claws over his fingers.

He ran the claws through the zebra's mane, tearing off the gum in a single pass, before he reached over to the waterbuck and removed the balloon.

Then he stood and walked over to the trailers wall, lifting his arm and shoving his claws through it, before dragging its hand to the side to tear great slashes into the metal. Fresh air whistled in through the rents, helping to clear out the horrible smell.

He didn't even glance at us the whole time, now moving back to refill the animals water bowls. I finally worked up enough nerve to ask, "What . . . what was that?"

He just looked silently at me for a moment, silver and amber gazing out from its shell.

After several moments, it said, "In this language, it is called Ripple." before he turned and sat down near the back, watching the three animals finish their meals.

I pressed, "But what is it?" Without glancing up from the three, it replied, "Life energy."

Then he just ignored me, and I knew that it wouldn't answer anymore questions on this "Ripple", especially not if I bugged him.

And I really didn't want to risk annoying it.

The animals just went to sleep as I crept back and curled up on a turnip sack, returning to not-quite looking at it as while Annabeth ate some Oreos and Percy seemed to be deep in thought.

I silently continued my not-quite watch over Anicetus as Percy and Annabeth talked, and it took me a moment to realize they were talking to me. "Huh, you say something, Percy?"

Annabeth spoke instead, saying, "I was telling him about how we met . . . what's wrong, Grover? You've been acting twitchy since Waterland."

Should I tell them? Would they even believe me? I experienced it and I . . .

I just said, "You wouldn't believe me." before glancing back at Anicetus to see Aella sitting in front of it, yipping at her father, and I managed to pick up, _"Pleeeaaasse, Papa."_ in fox-speech as she sat with her back to us, tail wagging. It just sighed and rubbed its head.

Percy and Annabeth looked at each other, before saying, "Try us."

Tearing my gaze away as Anicetus lay down on his side, I sighed and told them, "I died."

They just stared, and after looking me up and down, Percy said, "Uh, no, you didn't, you're sitting right here."

"Not literally, but . . . I felt myself die. I felt it kill me."

Annabeth narrowed her eyes. "It?"

I told them how I died, thinking back to where I got just the tiniest glimpse of what Anicetus really was . . .

 **Waterland, Earlier**

The net wound tighter over the pit, trapping my friends inside, and no matter how hard I pulled, I couldn't hold it open.

I stood and shouted, "Maia!" before leaping to try and yank at the net from the middle.

At least, that's what I intended, before I felt a grip like iron close over the back of my shirt as An dragged me back.

"What are you doing?! I have to help them!"

He didn't care. I tried to break free, but it was like a giant had grabbed me. He just dragged me closer and said, "There's nothing you can do from here." in a calm voice.

"So I should just let them die?! Let me go you crazy freak!"

He just said, "No, just wait for your moment." in that same even tone, but how could I wait? How could I just let another of my friends die? I have to help them! I have to-

Suddenly, massive fangs slammed down on me, and bit clean through my body.

I felt it, I felt them tearing through me, I felt my spine snap between those teeth, and I felt the ragged end of my backbone ground between them.

I felt blood spurt out from both my torn open lower half and up my throat, bursting from my mouth and splattering back down onto my face, some of it getting into one eye.

I was now lying on my back in its mouth, and I choked on its horrible breath.

This wasn't never-used-mouthwash bad breath, this wasn't anything that halitosis could create.

This was a scorching wind that reeked of nothing but fresh blood, a scalding blast of copper-tainted red steam that washed over and sunk into me to strangle the air from my lungs, and I felt like I was drowning under the remnants of countless slaughtered victims.

I was lying on something hard and sharp, on many hard and sharp things. Then I saw its tongues amidst the steam, and I knew what I was on.

There was several of them around me, not flat like a humans, but long and conical, and everything I could see in that huge mouth was covered, no, jam-packed with silver fangs, so many that I couldn't even see the flesh and muscle beneath them, row after row of flesh-ripping, bone-cracking points.

One of them wrapped around my left arm, the fangs rising up so the points rested against me. Then it coiled in, the fangs peeling and tearing everything away as they were dragged down, shearing away cloth and flesh and muscle and bone and marrow, leaving only a jagged stump behind, spurting red that the silver eagerly drank.

The rest of them followed the first, the one I was lying on raising its fangs to tear open my back, the others wrapping around me, one curling down to enter through my torn-open belly, another scraping open my chest, and another swiped over my face, shaving away my eyes and nose and cheeks and jaws, so I couldn't see or speak anymore, and I still couldn't make a sound.

And through it all, I could feel its hunger, so intense that it was a force, pulling at me from its throat, dragging me over the fanged tongue that ripped at my spine and ribs and lungs.

I knew it would never let me go, I would never escape that burning hell of gnashing, ravenous teeth, never run far or fast enough to get away from that hunger or _the thing_ that owned it.

That hunger was the single most terrifying thing I have ever encountered, beyond my absolute worst nightmares.

Being cooked alive as a cyclops' stew? Vanishing into obscurity searching for Pan, like my father before me? Dying alone in some monsters lair? Thalia's father cursing me for failing to save her? Monsters invading Camp Half-Blood and tearing apart me and all my friends?

Nothing, absolutely nothing, even came close to the yawning oblivion that threatened to swallow me. I could feel it gnawing my soul as it ate my body, and I knew that when it was done, I would never be reborn.

And even worse?

I could tell what I was feeling didn't even amount to a drop in the ocean for _this things_ overwhelming appetite.

It was going to kill everyone, it would hunt us, it would catch us and it would eat us all, eat our flesh and minds and souls, it would bite and rip and eat and eat and eat and eat and eat and eat and e-

Suddenly I was back at the park, my body intact and that same grip on my shirt as it stood silent behind me.

I just stood, the only move I could make being full-body trembling, too scared to even think, because it _might hear me_.

 _That thing_ let go of my shirt, walking around me, saying, "Now wait." as if nothing had happened.

 **Kindness International Truck, Present**

Percy and Annabeth stared at me in shock.

I could see they wanted to comfort me, but didn't know how.

Annabeth just opened and closed her mouth, trying to find something to say, but what do you say to that?

Percy didn't seem so confused, as, to my horror, he stood and drew Riptide, an angry expression on his face.

"Are you insane?!" I hissed in a low voice.

He just said, "Maybe I am," before turning and taking several steps towards Anicetus, slowing as he seemed confused and then freezing as he saw something, and I turned to see what.

At first I blinked in suprise, as it seemed Anicetus had disappeared, but then my eyes were drawn to a patch of half-obscured crimson that seemed to be floating in the air.

As I tried to make it out I noticed lines of another red that seemed to be hanging in the air, dark enough that it wasn't immediately noticed against the shadows at the trailers back, but still bright enough to stand out.

I noticed that the red lines seemed to criss-cross in the air, and as I followed them, I recognized the shape they took, and I froze in fear.

It formed a massive wolf, several times larger than the lion, yet still small enough to comfortably rest in the back of the trailer, curled up with its huge head near its back paws.(1)

It was covered in shaggy black fur that was red-tipped, scarlet outlining its body and limbs.

Its had wide, powerful shoulders and long, strong limbs. Its front legs ended in things closer to hands than paws, with two joints to form half-fingers, but all four paws ended in vicious claws. They weren't tipped with nails, no, the fingers and toe tips themselves just narrowed and hardened into cruel talons.

Its tail was almost as long as its entire body, a bushy length that curled around a powerful form of, judging from what wasn't covered by thick fur, iron-hard muscle.

That same body was covered in horrible scars, ranging from huge bite wounds to claw marks and vicious slashes that curved far enough around its form you would think the attacks that made them would of, _should have_ nearly cut it in half or hacked apart its heart and lungs.

It's huge head was similarly scarred, and its long neck was hidden beneath a thick mane, and that patch of half-covered crimson that we saw first resolved itself into a small fox kit resting on top of the wolf's head, her body mostly obscured within that mane.

I sat stock-still, trying not to make a sound to wake up the massive predator, but it proved futile as the almond-shaped eye facing us slowly opened, revealing that same amber and silver.

 _"Do you need something, Purse?"_ It didn't speak, at least not out loud, but I knew that was what it meant.

Apparently Percy could too, as he seemed to quickly recover at the question, holding his sword with both hands and placing it between himself and Anicetus. "What did you do to Grover?"

It didn't answer at first, silently eyeing both Percy and Riptide. _"I told him to sit still, but he didn't want to listen, so I convinced him."_

Percy tightened his grip on the sword. "You can't do that. You can't just threaten people to do what you want!"

 _"There's a trembling satyr behind you that proves I can."_

Percy growled at its words and moved forward, and I saw its lip pull back to reveal the tips of long fangs in response, and desperate to save my friend from having his guts splatter the walls, I yelled a question I had been too scared to ask earlier. "Why did you help the animals?!"

Aella grumbled and shifted at my shout. The wolfs eye shifted to look at me. _"Lower your voice."_

I flinched back, softly saying, "Sorry, sorry . . . why did you help the animals?"

 _"Duty."_

That answer suprised me. I was expecting something like 'because I felt like it' or 'because I was bored.' But duty? Why would he . . . then I remembered what it had done, said, back at Waterland.

"You said you're a god, right?" reaching out and managing to pull Percy back from angering the god. He was lucky to get away with taunting Ares, but I knew this one wouldn't let him off so easy.

You do not go near a wild animal and its child.

Percy, senses dulled by city life, didn't seem to understand that if he had taken another step towards Anicetus, and by extension, its daughter, with his sword drawn, then Anicetus would butcher him on the spot.

It sighed. _"No, but I don't feel like getting into that, so let's just say yeah."_

"Is that why you helped them?" I managed to get out without stuttering, before I realized I was now the closest to what looked like a solid ton of muscle and teeth. "I-is that why you look like that?"

It snorted. _"Unlike_ _those Olympian brats, when I took up authority over the wild upon this world, I understood that it was my duty to watch over my domain, and not just blindly leech off it."_

It gave a huff of disgust.

"As _for my current form, Aella prefers to sleep like this. She is still young enough to allow it."_

I didn't catch most of what he said after 'authority over the wild,' and it took me several moments to recover myself.

A god of the wild? Another one? How? How could there be two gods of the wild?

My mind shook as another question popped into it: could he know where Pan is?

"So you're like Pan? Do you-"

Then it looked at me, and the silver pupil expanded to cover its whole eye, smothering out the orange, and I felt like I had stepped into a furnace.

Rage . . . when you thinks about rage, you think 'red,' don't you?

When I saw that moon-pale eye staring at me, the idea of red representing anger was blown away. How could red compare to the sheer, horrible fury staring out from that white horror?

The air around it started to shimmer and warp, as if heated by a fire, and I just knew that it would burn us to cinders if it came too close.

A low growl like subterranean thunder rumbled out from deep in its chest as it stood, uncurling to reveal more of its frame and exposing a symbol on its left shoulder.

It was brass against black, brazen bars crossing to form a bestial skull with four horns and four fangs(2). Just the sight made me feel an echo of that same violent hunger I had barely glimpsed, the feeling of fangs at my throat, around my limbs, sinking into my gut.

I was snapped back to attention by its voice, and I looked back at it to see its fur, instead of standing up like most animals, had instead lain back, forming a sleek coat over its strong frame, the long mane stiffening into a mass of vicious looking spines, showing more of Aella (somehow still asleep), as it silently bared massive silver fangs that looked more like crooked knives than teeth and curled its tail over it like a scorpions stinger.

I froze as I saw that the inside of its mouth was completely silver.

 _ **"Don't EVER compare me to that WRETCHED COWARD.**_ _ **"**_

Normally, I would be terrified. I would be desperate to calm the god and try to save my friends . . . but the heat of its fury . . . there was something . . .

I couldn't just stay quiet.

"D-d-don't talk about him like that, don-"

 _ **"Or what, you'll whine and run away like the rest of your pathetic race?"**_

It seemed to get angrier at it spat the words, and as its fury rose, the air around it seemed to burn hotter, scorching the metal around it, distorting the air until all I could see was a shimmering mass of darkness, but the silver still showed clear through, bright knives against a silver void, topped by silver-white suns.

Suddenly, I seemed to gain my nerve back, with interest, as I shouted, "DON'T YOU MOCK US, YOU BASTARD, DON'T YOU DARE MOCK US!"

It paused, observing me, but with my newfound suicidal courage, I just glared back.

In the back of my mind, some tiny internal monologue consisted mostly of "WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING?! I AM SO GOING TO DIEEEEEE!"

Then it smirked, as if it was . . . amused?

It sat back down, its fur raising back up and his mane falling limp to cover Aella again as the silver shrunk to allow the amber back in.

Then what I had just done fully sank in, that small voice filled my whole mind, and I felt certain I was about to either be cursed, or die a horrible, painful death.

 _"Apologies, Grover."_

I blinked.

Blinked again.

Blinked once more as my mind tried to comprehend how I wasn't a banana slug being chased by salt-wielding maniacs. I intelligently replied, "Huh?"

He laughed, _"Who would have thought the satyr would have more spine than the demigods!"_ and gave a warm smile.

My mouth opened and closed as I struggled to comprehend the sudden change in temper of the apparently bipolar god.

 _"You were asking about me being a . . ._ _god,"_ it sighed out the word, _"y_ es?"

"Th-that's right, sir."

 _". . . Well?"_

"You-" I paused to take a breath, to try and calm down, "you said that you 'took up authority over the wild,' right? How?"

 _"It's the same as any other choice, Grover, I simply decided to take that mantle while upon this world. Your 'big three' were assigned their domains, not born to them, yes?"_

"But-but the wild hasn't improved, its just as bad!"

It smiled, as if amused by a childs question.

 _"Oh, and how would you know, little satyr, you has never even left America?"_

It chuckled _._

 _"But I know why you would think that. I have been focusing my attentions on guarding and improving other lands, so this one has only felt minimal effects from my changes. So far."_

"Why?"

He snorted and lowered his head. _"I promised Mother I wouldn't kill the Olympian vermin without Her permission, and it's much easier to tolerate them when I don't have to deal with or look at them."_

Its eyes narrowed. _"Though given their **continued** incompetence, I may have to change my policy, and actually stomach their presence."_

"Vermin?!" Oh, Annabeth got her nerve back . . . oh no. "How can you call the creators of the West vermin?!"

 _"By knowing that they aren't responsible for Western civilization, and they just follow it around like strays looking for scraps. By objectively looking over what they have actually done, and seeing them for the_ _incompetent pricks most of them are. I would call them parasites, but I wouldn't insult decent parasites with the comparision."_

Our collective jaws dropped at the casual act of blasphemy.

"I-i-"

 _"That's right, Bettie. Say it with me, in-com-pe-tent."_

"How can you possibly be so arrogant as to put yourself above Olympus?!"

 _"By actually being better than them,"_ It deadpanned her. _"It's not arrogance if its true, Bettie."_

"Well who is your mother then?! Who's the ma-"

Suddenly its tail shot out and slammed into Annabeth, knocking her over and pinning her to the ground. I could hear her ribs creaking as the tail pushed down, even over her cries.

"Let her go!" Percy shouted, raising Riptide and trying to take a swing at the tail, but it just flexed to the side, slamming into him and knocking him into the wall, hard.

The tail curled around Annabeth and dragged her forward, holding her in the air before its head, again baring pure silver eyes.

 _"Before, you asked me what I am. I have been and am many things throughout my existence, mercenary, pirate, general, tyrant, but something I have always been is a mamas . . . well, boy, for the moment,"_ the tail tightened around her, drawing pained groans as her ribs threatened to snap, _"and you never, EVER, insult the mother, of a mamas boy."_

It tossed her back, and I scrambled to get some ambrosia into them.

 _"You fools really should be more grateful to Mother, She's the sole reason I haven't exterminated Olympus. Hell, if it wasn't for Her, a good chunk of your multiverse would have been devoured before Father brought me to heel."_

I froze at that, and it seemed to sense my question, as it chuckled to itself.

 _"To put it simply, Mother is the only being in your entire multiverse that had the strength to not only survive conceiving me, but to actually raise me. If She had been weak, I would have eaten Her alive from inside Her womb before consuming the world that had the misfortune to be present for my birth."_

"Who are they?" I asked, wondering what pair of monsters could have brought this thing into existence.

It just smirked at me, _"Mother is the mother of Rome, the one you know as the Capitoline Wolf."_

It bared its teeth in a what was absolutely not a smile.

 _"Hello, little Grecians."_

I could feel Annabeth start shaking, still trying to recover.

 _"Father . . . well, you runts are way too far down the ladder to know any of His names, though I bet that if you did, you weaklings would be begging not too."_

 _"So with that in mind, I imagine that you runts and your faithborn parents would only know Him as Chaos."_

My jaw could not have been any lower without entering Hades realm, and I could feel Annabeth freeze, though Percy was still dazed from the blow.

 _"Or, at least one of its faces, though again, you runts wouldn't know anything about that."_

 _"Tell me Grover, have you ever wondered why Pan disappeared?"_

I managed to get out another "Huh?"

 _"In all the years you satyrs have spent searching, have any of you actually stopped a moment and tried to consider the possible reasons for Pans disappearance?"_

". . . . . . No, we . . . I've never thought about it. We just know we have to find him."

 _"No, you don't, but that's another matter."_

 _"Let me tell you the possibilities as I see them."_

 _"First, he truly died. 'The great god Pan is dead' and all that."_

 _"Second, he ran away, he abandoned his duty and chose to hide like a coward."_

 _"Third, he's been taken by something strong enough to overpower him, and has spent all this time trapped and no doubt tortured by his mysterious captor."_

 _"So tell me Grover,_ _which would you prefer to find: a corpse, a coward, or a broken, most likely insane, weakling?"_

I struggled to come up with an answer or a comeback, but it just laid its head down and closed its eyes.

 _"I don't want to hear another word from you three until we arrive. Then I suggest that you leave to find another ride, as I deal with our drivers as duty demands."_

We decided to listen, somehow managing to fall asleep.

 **Anicetus Pov**

Well, this was boring.

Mostly talking and only one fight, and I had to make that happen.

I would prefer to leave for a more entertaining game, but that would set a bad example for Aella.

The only pleasant suprise so far was Grover. Who would've thought he would - albeit briefly - suddenly develop a bair of brass balls. Maybe this deserves some attention.

Go on, make the jokes, we'll wait.

.

.

.

.

You good? Allright, moving on.

Oh, what's this? It would seem Purse is taking a bit of a spirit walk. Wonder what he's seeing.

I was considering using **[Death 13]** to observe, before I felt Aella shift above me, whining out, " _Papa_ , _what's going oooon? Why's everyone so loud?"_

I had to supress a growl at the three.

 _"Nothing_ _. Just the idiots complaining again. Go back to sleep."_

 _"But I'm up_ _nooooow_." She scooched forward, placing her paws on my muzzle to lean down and look at me. _"Maaaaybeeee if you sung, Papa?"_

I just chuckled. _"Of course_ _."_

She let out a little, _"Yaaay,"_ before scooting herself a bit back into my ruff, doing her best to burrow into the warm fur.

I altered my body to accommodate her, giving off soft rumbling to vibrate the air, producing the music, before I began singing to her in a soft voice.(3)

 _The greatest adventure is what lies ahead._

 _Today and tomorrow, are yet to be said._

 _The chances, the changes are all yours to make._

 _The mold of your life is in your hands to break._

Aella was humming along with me, occasionally cooing out a few words.

 _The greatest adventure is there if you're bold._

 _Let go of the moment that life makes you hold._

 _To measure the meaning can make you delay;_

 _It's time to stop thinkin' and wasting the day._

She let out a big yawn and laid on her belly, legs stretched out. For the next part, I kept my voice in the same low, soothing tone I had used for the rest, instead of following Glenn's example with the sudden rise.

 _The one who's a dreamer, and never takes leave_

 _Who thinks of a world that's just make-believe_

 _Will never know passion, will never know pain._

 _Who sits by the window, will one day see rain._

She was nearly there, just letting out a few little twitches as she tried to fight off sleep, trying to hear the complete song.

 _The greatest adventure is what lies ahead._

 _Today and tomorrow, are yet to be said._

 _The chances, the changes are all yours to make._

 _The mold of your life is in your hands to break._

And she's out, head lying on my own and letting out even breaths as I finished.

 _The greatest adventure is what . . lies . . aheeeeaaad._

I altered my perception to look at her, and the sight of her small crimson-furred body lying amidst my scarlet-tipped black made me smile.

Then I turned my attention to the three beasts before me, and again altered my body, tendrils stretching from me to brush over them as I bestowed a certain "blessing."

I spent the next several hours considering the worth of this irrelevant little quest I had forced myself into, half-heartedly entertaining thoughts of butchering the trio, ending their quest, with the masterbolt lost amidst their gory remains in this truck, resulting in the vermin tearing each other apart.

But I wouldn't. Fun to think about, though.

Oh, what's this? An intruder? Hm, maybe this would be a fun distraction. Maybe they'll use some of the lines!

Wait, what are . . . wait, wait, wait! Damn it, don't take my fun!

The intruder didn't last a minute against them.

Well damn. I let out a little huff of annoyance.

I heard the trucks brakes hiss as it ground to a halt. Well, well, time for business.

The sound and movement jolted Annabeth and Grover awake, Grover reaching over to shake Percy awake as Annabeth told them to hide, donning her inviso-cap as Percy and Grover dove behind feed sacks.

I shifted, coiling my body to pounce as the trailer doors creaked open, sunlight and heat pouring in.

"Man!" the trucker said, waving his hand in front of his nose. "I wish I hauled appliances." He climbed inside, and paused when he saw the torn open cages. "What the he-"

I lunged, tackling him out of the trailer and pinning him beneath my paws, feeling his ribs crack under my weight.

I turned sharply to see the other one besides the trailer, noting the children fleeing from the imminent slaughter, although Grover paused to look back before the other two dragged him.

My tail lashed out, slamming him into the trailers side before dragging him forward.

The humans in the street screamed and ran as they saw me and the three beasts behind me, one brave policeman drawing his gun to take a shot.

I simply looked at him.

He ignited, flash-burning in a silent pillar of ravenous red fire, which dispersed to show not even ash was left, his death unremarked save for a "bang" as air rushed to fill the empty space.

The bullets he managed to fire were exposed to a wall of pure heat, evaporating before they could impact.

I turned back to observe the three venting their wrath, the lions jaws buried in the gut of one of the screaming smugglers while the zebra and waterbuck stomped and gored the other.

Then I turned, ignoring the humans and shifting back to my current human form, walking towards the intruder and the other, the same direction the children had taken.

I paid no mind as the three beasts began to change from my blessing, their bodies writhing with new flesh and new power.

'Lotus Hotel and Casino', hm?

I stepped inside the air-conditioned building, catching the smell of lotus blossoms and feeling the difference in time as I entered.

I sensed what this place was immediately. Seems more a place for their mother than them, but I suppose they would enjoy themselves here.

"Hey!" a casually dressed bellhop came towards me. "Welcome to the Lotus Ho-"

His spiel ended when I reached out, without breaking stride, and ripped off his jaw, the skin and muscle from his throat and chest tearing off with the mandible.

Moving on, I dragged the twitching corpse behind me, and no one noticed or cared about the murder, or about me chowing down on my latest meal.

I tracked the other through the casual entertainments, finding a hall that travelled beneath the lobby.

Soon enough, I encountered a familiar white-haired, red-eyed face with a scar on his chin, seated on a fine chair at an intersection.

"Hello, Jin."

The Bount stood and bowed at the chest to me, his arm crossing said chest. "Lord Anicetus."

He moved down the left tunnel, leading me towards them, and soon we arrived at a large wooden door. He opened it, stepping inside and keeping it open until I passed through, entering into a large room, to the sound of wailing.

I could see the other members of their entourage lounging around the room, but all of them were paying attention to their master, adoration shining in their eyes.

I saw the other kneeling down in front of the weeping intruder, speaking to them in a soothing tone. It would seem they were in a female form, but still clad in her usual colors.

I felt her presence weighing upon the room, and I looked down to observe the intruder kneeling in front of her, offering something in cupped hands.

I looked upon a familiar whisker-scarred face. Ah, another Naruto.

This version of Naruto had black hair, and was wearing all black, from his spiked boot to his opera-length gloves. There was a broken sword behind him, a zanpakuto from the remnants of a soul once bound to it.

In his gloved hands was a pair of blood-spattered eyes, rinnegan and mangekyou sharingan. I saw he had torn them from his own skull, tears mixing with trails of blood as he gibbered and sobbed.

She hushed and crooned to him, drawing him close in a one-armed hug.

His continued his broken, gasping sobbing in her embrace, but now it started slowing as he died, his body breaking down under sheer grief.

His body started to dissolve, shredding apart like ashes from a fire, until he disappeared, less than dust.

Then she looked up at me, bright tears flowing from a flawless lavender eye as she weeped with the dead weakling, and I saw a small kit Kurama cradled in her other arm.

I said, "Hello, cousin."

* * *

Supersaiyandiclonius: A bit late of a reply, but about Alucard being an old friend. To put it simply, Alucard is not one of the people that Anicetus admires in the Hellsing Ultimate multiverse.

If Anicetus ever did take part in those events, then he is far more likely to side with Millenium, or more specifically, The Major, than with Hellsing.

1 = Appearance base: werewolf demon by wolf no shi.

2 = The Mark of Khorne, specifically the version on the Khorgoraths, twisted into a shape somewhere between my own avatar picture and the Fear Factory Transgression symbol.

3 = The Greatest Adventure by Glenn Yarbrough

How many of you have tried to write a story, found it bored you, and continued trying to write it because there are later scenes you want to write?

That's how i've been feeling about this chapter trying to accurately write Percy, Annabeth and Grover. I suck at it, but that's a whole other matter.

Several times I considered giving this up and trying to write the prequel to another story I want to do.

However, I am a stubborn prick, and for all my bitching, will most likely try to end this story before I get to that.

Ideas, feedback and amusing flames are appreciated.


	7. Chapter 7

For the few that enjoyed this story, sorry, it seems I'm a poorer writer than even I suspected, as I can't seems to force myself past this chapter. Which is sad, I had ideas on where to take this, and even had most of "Hero of Olympus" worked out.

In recompense:

I recommend the youtube video "happ fluffy bois" by rapid liquid, both to create awwws and so you can have an idea of what Anicetus looked like as a puppy. Enjoy the adorable ideas of the mass of hunger and violence bouncing around as a chubb pupp.

I leave the idea of a warhammer/percy crossover where the seaweed brain is a son of Mermedus (since most of the PJO fandom seems focused upon making ooc Percys instead of full on OCs) a minor chaos god that shares Poseidons powers over wind and ocean, but trades his earthshaker powers out for necromancer/soul slaving, and given how powerful the Four are, would most likely rank somewhere between titan and primordial within the PJO universe, power-wise.

This is one of several fanfics that suprises me by their lack of existence, such as the lack of Avatar/Korra stories where they have to face off with elemental spirits, because you think the questions of fighting a being that not only renders one of their elements useless, but is probably pissed about having portions of its being enslaved to the will of benders, would be an interesting story.

A recommendation for those who want to create a Slaaneshi fanfic. Watch the 1953 movie "House of Wax" with Vincent Price, as that is a fine example of what Slaanesh does beyond the usual "porn for the porn god."

I may come back to this story someday, but it seems unlikely as I'll probably write a short prequel to another story that I seem to have far more success with the rough draft.

Oh and for the Mermedus thing, someone made a Norscan army project with a creature called "Avatar of Mermedus" on Tapatalk, so you may want to look at that for your own use.


End file.
